#ManDayBlog Every Woman Loves A Man Who Has Integrity And Good Character

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It takes a lot to be a good man, that’s why being a good man is so admirable amongst other good people. It takes discipline, sacrifice and a long track record of good decision making to bring out these great qualities, and that’s what will set you apart. It’s easy to take the low road because there’s no challenge, no one holding you accountable, and no one pushing you to be better. On the high road, you’ll find other people who are constantly making better decisions, reaching for new heights and encouraging one another along the way. The beauty of having integrity is that those who also have it will recognize it inside of you which will establish trust and prompt the start of a meaningful relationship.

Society is filled with people who lack integrity, which is why we as a people must be governed by regulated officials and authorities to ensure that we all live in fairness. Just imagine watching a sports game with no referees… the game would never end because it would boil down to integrity. And when a championship is on the line, you can count on integrity going right out of the window. It will be a matter of his word against theirs, so in the end who do we believe? If you choose the team on the left, you’ll upset the team on the right and vice versa. To eliminate these problems, we bring in a number of referees who are held to a higher standard and will call the game in fairness.

You don’t have to be an elected official to choose to live by a higher standard, you can simply be a son, brother, husband, father or friend. Your peers will respect you more if you have established yourself as someone who has good character and can be trusted. How do you build this trust? It’s simple, all you have to do is be the best man you can be, and that will require doing the right thing for yourself and for others. Your ability to prove yourself worthy of trust will be the staple that holds your relationship with other people together.

When you apply for a job, they ask a series of questions that reflect your work history, educational background, demographic and criminal history. All of the information provided on the application is relevant to the employer because before hiring you, they want to have an idea of who you are. They also want to feel confident in knowing that you are not only capable of doing the job, but also that you can be trusted with their resources and information. By being honest on your application despite how you feel it may hurt or improve your chances, you build trust with that employer. They’re going to do a background check anyway, and the truth is bound to come out, give them ahead start by being open and honest from the beginning.

In today’s times, people are always on guard because they’re so used to other people trying to manipulate or cheat a system to make it work in their favor. By being transparent, having integrity and being honest, you will have great success in not only bringing down those walls, but also in opening up doors. It’s a breath of fresh air to have someone around their friends, family and/or business that they can trust. If you can manage to be that breathe of fresh air, people will not only want to have you around, but they will need to have you around. Make yourself indispensable by offering an open and honest relationship that is built on trust.

When establishing your inner circles at school or at work, the first thing people will notice about you is your character. People are interested in knowing who you are as a person, and once they figure you out, the information gathered will be the determining factor in who sticks around and who keeps their distance. Once you show that you have integrity, people will feel more comfortable about opening doors that lead to their wisdom, their network, and their resources. There will be subliminal tests thrown your way such as conversations about your relationships with women, money time and God. It may seem like nothing initially, but to them, your relationship with women, money, time and God is in fact everything!

People want to know about your relationship with other women because it reflects what you stand for as a man. People will be particularly interested in you relationship with your mother because she is the woman who brought you into this world. She laid down the foundation and has set the standard by which you will treat the woman you associate with in the future. Sometimes the opportunity to have morals, values and principles instilled in you by your mother is missed, and that has considerable influence on how you interact with other women. This information is extremely valuable to a man who has a sister, daughter or a wife. A man who knows his role looks to protect the women in his family against all possible threats, even if that means keeping a barrier between him and you.

Women are very sensitive, very delicate and look to a man for protection. For this reason, a woman of substance makes a man wait to get close to her heart and body. She wants to be sure that he can be trusted with it and that he won’t intentionally cause her grief and pain. Having a track record of being loyal, respectful, fair and kind will expedite your progress with a woman, as she will have lowered her guards just for you. If you want a woman to stay, give her hope. If you want a woman to leave, give her doubt!

People want to know about your relationship with money because it reflects your values and discipline. A man who values money and shows discipline can also be trusted with it and around it. By having a healthy relationship with money, people will feel more comfortable inviting you into their home and around their business and resources. Being a good steward of money will also propel your relationship with others to new heights because they will view you as someone who could help them do the same. The more people see value in you, the more they will want to invest in you.

People want to know about your relationship with time because they don’t want theirs to be wasted. If a person doesn’t make the best of your time, they shouldn’t be blessed with your time. They will look to see what you’ve done, what you’re doing and what your plans are for the future. It’s easy to pretend that you’re making progress and making moves, but to a person who’s really doing it, they’ll be able to see right through you. Being honest about your progress in life will allow others to see what you are missing from your life as well as what they can add to your life. Your time is too valuable to waste it on people who aren’t going places, and other people will feel the same way about you.

How you spend your time and who you spend your time with is important in the realm of building relationships. Take public figures for example, they cannot afford to be seen associating with people who lack integrity because that makes them guilty by association. The association with someone who makes poor decisions with their time is also a reflection of them and can hinder their progress in life. By spending your time doing positive things, you’ll attractive more positive people and opportunities. If you’re having trouble figuring out how to stay positive, simply surround yourself with positive people.

People want to know about your relationship with God because your level of spirituality portrays that you acknowledge a power that is greater than you. Submission to this higher power keeps you humble, influences your attitude towards others. Not only will your relationship with God help your relationship with others, but it will help you to build a relationship with yourself. You will begin to see the value in you, understand your worth, and use your findings to inspire others. God is love, and when you make a spiritual connection, you will start doing things out of love.

Your reputation is everything, so be protect it at all costs. It’s easier to walk in truth than to fight over a lie. Every day you should look to improve as a man, and you do this by being proactive and always aspiring to have more. There’s no such thing as a free lunch, so take pride in working your way up to the top, and when you get there help others get there too. Life is about building relationships and leaving behind legacies, so start building yours today. When you leave this earth, stories will be told about the way you lived your life and the things you achieved. You are in a position to write your own story in the way you want others to tell it, and that’s by living in truth.

When others speak about your character, you want them to speak highly of you and to model after you. You want people to be inspired by your struggle, inspired by your failures and inspired by your successes.

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#ManDayBlog Marriage is Forever!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Every time I go to a wedding I find myself chuckling on the inside when then priest gets to the “Til death do you part” part of the sermon. It’s one of those “Are you SURE you want to do this?” moments. Lol I imagine that particular moment to be a nervous one because once you say, “I do”, you’re declaring before God and witnesses that you are in it for the long haul. This is a moment that is literally going to change your life forever!

I suppose that’s what makes it so scary for so many people; it’s not the word marriage that scares them, it’s the word change. Everything that you’re used to has to change for the sake of your marriage, and sometimes that can be a good thing. Sometimes we do things wrong our entire lives, and because we’ve been doing it wrong for so long, we are convinced that it’s right. Sometimes change is exactly the thing we need in order to finally get it right. At times our pride won’t allow us to admit that our way isn’t working, isn’t fruitful or isn’t productive.

What a marriage offers is another perspective from someone who genuinely cares. I don’t know about you, but the person I spend the rest of my life with has to genuinely care about my thoughts, feelings, passion and my pain. I couldn’t imagine sharing a life with someone who takes no interest in the things that interest me. I’ve committed to many things in life and what mattered the most was the end result. If I’m working hard on a basketball team, I want to win a championship. If I’m putting forth my time, energy, effort and money into college, I want to earn a degree.

The same applies to my marriage, if I’m committed to you for a lifetime I want her knowledge, resources, love and support forever and ever. This is why it’s extremely important to know who you are, and know who you’re dealing with. If you choose wrong, you could end up miserable forever and ever. You want to be in union with someone that you value and who values you, so be sure to take your time before making this crucial life changing decision.

My grandparents on my father’s side were married for 50+ years until my grandmother passed away in 1995. My grandfather passed away in 2004 and at that age, I was too young to even think about marriage, let alone the value of it. If he were alive to day I would ask him questions about his values, what made him fall in love with my grandmother, and what kept them together for so long. If I had to guess, I would say that it was pure unfiltered love. They loved each other enough to stay together, value each other, and set an example for generations to come.

They were always pleasant around one another, it was as if they knew exactly what the other wanted out of life, and allowed each other to enjoy it. My grandmother was a smoker, and she eventually died of cancer at an old age. My grandfather never belittled my grandmother or bashed her for habit of smoking (not in front of us anyway). I would imagine that he came to terms with this was a habit she was unwilling to give up, and that he would have to live with. That’s a beautiful thing when two people are able to accept each other with their flaws and all and still love them to death.

Like most men, my grandfather didn’t do too much talking, but he did a lot of doing. He was consistent with his behavior when we came around. He would ask us questions about school, set a bowl of candy out for us, prepare dinner before we arrived and then take us to the park where he would take candid photos of us. Everyone needs an escape from home from time to time and for an old man, this was the perfect opportunity. My grandfather was real calm, cool and sometimes a little grouchy, and perhaps the grouchy part was something that my grandmother had to get over.

There building had a wonderful view of the Williamsburg bridge in Brooklyn, and we loved to look at the night’s skyline as kids. I would imagine that that was something my grandparents enjoyed doing as well. They had 3 sons and a host of grandchildren and great grandchildren that they could be proud of. They had done something with their lives that would never be forgotten. They built a relationship with one another and left behind a legacy in this world, and they did it all together.

If there’s nothing else I admired about my grandparents, it’s definitely their values for marriage. We all will face the day when we are no longer able to write a book, give a speech, or pass down a tradition with our words. Our actions throughout the courses of our lives in many cases will be all the lesson that future generations will need to learn and grow. I can’t sit here and say that my grandfather never taught me anything about marriage simply because he never spoke of it. He taught me the value of marriage by standing by his wife until she took her last breath.

That’s not something you see everyday, especially in this day in age where people are walking in and out of marriages like a revolving door. I would like to think of marriage as a final destination; you’ve stopped everywhere else and now it’s time to settle down. I would imagine that people such as my grandparents who have been married for so long had to make a few stops before hand. There’s nothing wrong with exploring the world, traveling, meeting new people and enjoying the single life first. In fact, it’s highly recommended; doing so will allow you to see the value in the trade-off from single to married life.

Look forward to building your first home, and one day sharing it with someone special. Look forward to traveling the world, trying new things and meeting new people, and plan to one day do these things with your wife and family. Look forward to partnering in business with your wife and making future investments together. Look forward to sharing your time, resources, love and money with your wife. View marriage as a life-long investment and plan to be married until death.

Throughout the course of your life, you will meet many people who will come and go. Some will leave because they didn’t belong there in the first place, some will leave because they’ve found someone more worthy of their time, and some will feel they have no further use for you. Life is about building relationships and leaving behind legacies; the more valuable you are to a person, the more they will want you around. When you focus your energy at one area at a time, you can yield the greatest benefits. By choosing someone that you promise to spend the rest of your life with, you are able the channel everything in your power towards their happiness, and that’s the best way to keep a wife. Happy wife, happy life!

Of my two best friends, one of them is married, has two daughters and appears to be very happy. They’ve been together for over 5 years and I’m happy to see that they’re progressing. I’m extremely proud because I know where he used to be in life, and now I see a better man than he ever was. Like any other marriage, they have ups and downs, but they are going through the motions together. When I see him post pictures and messages about his family on Facebook it makes me proud to see that he’s being the quality man of substance that his wife and family deserves.

Anytime a married client comes to me for advice, I don’t offer them a way out; I offer them a way right back in. The only way to work it out is to simply work it out. That’s what being loyal to a marriage is all about, finding the inner strength, the desire and the self-discipline to sustain the union until death. If you walk away from everything in your life that falls apart or isn’t working, you’ll never acquire the knowledge of how to fix things. Loyalty may be a small word but it’s a BIG thing.

It’s easy to just walk away, and if you’re looking for something that is easy, marriage isn’t it. Ask anyone who’s been married or is married and they will tell you that it’s hard work. In fact, this may be one of the hardest things you’ll ever have to do in life, but the best part is you won’t have to do it alone. You have a partner who will be there when you laugh, when you cry, when you’re up and when you’re down. You’ll have someone to create new memories with and to cherish the old ones.

Being loyal to your marriage will build character not only in you but also in everyone around you. Your friends will look at you as a beam of hope and will aspire to one day have a partner for life. Your children will respect you for getting it right, showing discipline and being an active part of the family as a whole. Your family and your community will commend you on your diligence and celebrate with you every year and you honor your anniversary. When you are gone, the people who remember you will speak about the things you valued in life and your marriage will be right at the top of that list.

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#ManDayBlog Every Woman Loves A Man Who Is Financially Responsible

Two things that we men value most in life are our time and our money. Our time gives us the opportunity to build relationships, find happiness and make a difference in this world. Our money helps us to further reach those goals. In order to be successful at building relationships, finding happiness and making a difference in the world, we must learn to properly manage one of the things that help us to do so. Our money has the power that we give it, but before we give it, we must place some sort of value on it.

When I was a kid, I placed high value on pennies, but apparently not everyone did. I would find pennies in the couch, outside on the ground on the floors of stores, you name it. Since nobody else wanted them, I would pick them up, put them in my piggy bank and over time would wrap them up in 50-cent wrappers and spend them. I remember asking my family members to save their pennies just for me. They happily obliged and every time I saw them, I had a few dollars that I could spend (in pennies). These brown, dirty coins meant the world to me because it afforded me everything that I wanted at the time.

My appreciation for pennies as a child has helped me tremendously as an adult because I learned how to appreciate money right down to the cent. I also realized that if I wanted to have more than just pennies, I wouldn’t find them lying around on the ground, in my couch or on the floor of a grocery store, but I had to earn it. My mother had 5 boys and 1 girl, so if you can imagine, money had to stretch over all of us, and if we wanted anything extra, we had to earn it. My siblings and I caught on to this early on and began our entrepreneurial endeavors. We knew that no matter how much money we earned while we were out hustling, we had to make it stretch over time.

I would always wonder where my older brothers were getting their extra money from, because I knew for sure that my mom wouldn’t dare overlook me (the obedient one) lol and give only to my brothers. They finally let me in on their secret and told me they were bagging groceries at Shop Rite at Route 440 in Jersey City. I was excited because this was something that I could do; all I had to do was get my older brothers to take me with them. They soon obliged and I immediately went to work bagging groceries, pushing their carts to their car and getting tipped for my good service.

I had more money in my pocket than ever (tax free), not that I knew what taxes were at 9 years old. Now what to do with all this money, hmmmm? I bought popcorn, pretzels, a hero, oodles of noodles, a case of soda, fruit snacks, and kept the rest for a rainy day. I was in HEAVEN! The best part was we all had our own money, so we didn’t have to try our usual scheme to mooch off of one another’s dough. This was my first taste of financial independence; money that I earned on my own that didn’t come from mom.

As the money came and went, I quickly learned what it meant to earn a living and be financially responsible. I enjoyed when the money came, and was sad when the money went. I had to figure out how to get the money to stay in my account otherwise I’ll never truly be financially free. I know, these aren’t the typical worries of a 9 year old, but my entrepreneurial spirit kicked in early! I wanted what I wanted when I wanted it and I didn’t want to have to depend on my mother to give it to me.

For a lot of young men, there are no lessons on what to do with a dollar once he gets it. This often results in a boy who grows into a man not understanding the value of money. When there’s no value in principle placed on a dollar, he’ll treat it as if it’s just a dollar. But no, it’s more than just $1, it’s a tool that can help you build anything you want in life, all you need is a blueprint. When you think about an infrastructure, there’s a blueprint for what you foresee coming to life in the future. There’s also an advisory board consisting of stakeholders, contractors, and investors who are involved in the process of the development.

Before the shovel even hits the dirt, there is a plan on what to do with every dollar invested; also known as a budget. This budget is designed to invest in anything that will add value to your progress and help avoid any overspending. This way when you decide to go into your bank account to make withdrawals, you have a certain amount allocated to whatever it is you’re doing while leaving some left over. Without a budget, you’ll be prone to empty out the entire account and spend with no end in sight. This is fast and easy way to stay broke, by not budgeting your money.

Figure out what your expenses are on a daily, weekly, monthly and yearly basis and try to keep them at a minimum. If you can avoid adding on new expenses, by all means do so. Your fixed expenses such as your rent, car note, cell phone bill, transportation, food, etc should be accounted for in advance. If your expenses outweigh your income, you’ll either have to cut down your expenses or figure out a way to generate more income. Maybe a cheaper rates plan on your cell phone, or cut down on driving and take public transportation. The idea is to balance out your account to where you have more coming in than going out.

This will help you gain the financial freedom that you desire which will give you more time to spend with your friends, family and loved ones. With all of these things, you will gain peace of mind. Managing your money isn’t something that’s impossible; it’s simply something that you have to work towards. You have to learn to respect the money that you earn, and use it to invest in things that will yield a return. The more you invest in things that yield a return, the more returns you’ll have coming in. If you spend every dollar that you have, you’ll have to work longer and harder to keep money coming in.

If you’re working a full-time and you’re always broke, it’s not the income that’s the problem it’s the outcome. The money is there, but the person who possesses it isn’t making the best use of it. Anytime you get a dollar in your hand you should think to yourself, “How can I turn this $1 into more?”. If you have that kind of attitude towards money, you’ll find yourself on the receiving end of more it. Work smarter, not harder.

When I was 6 years old, I was hit by a car and the judge awarded me a large settlement that I would receive once I turned 21. When I was 6 I would say I would use the money to buy my mom a house, and would disregard any sibling who was ever mean to me. Lol As I grew older, as my feelings towards my mother changed (typical kid) and as my expenses grew my mind slowly changed. I was a sophomore in college and boy could I use the money. I took a lump sum as opposed to receiving payments every 5 years.

I thought to myself “Tomorrow’s not promised, and if I’m smart about my investment, I’ll have made far more money than this settlement could offer by the time I’m able to receive it”. I invested in a new laptop, made a payment on my school tuition, put some in the bank, and invested $10,000 into my new photography equipment. To date, I’ve made that money many times over with my photography business and am very much satisfied with the decision I’ve made to pursue my passion. I could’ve went on a crazy shopping spree with all that money, but that would not yield me any future return. The goal for me was to invest in something that could forever generate income.

When you make your first investment, and it goes well, share it with your close family members and friends. This is a great way to build relationships with them and to show them where you are in life. When people see that you are buying your first home, starting your own business, or giving to charity, you’ll motivate them to do the same. People want to be surrounded by positive and successful people, so make sure that you make the cut. The way to get invited into one of these circles is to simply focus on your life, your business and your finances and work towards success.

All it takes is discipline, a set of goals and a plan of action and you are on your way to becoming the financially responsible adult you are destined to be. This will help boost your esteem, improve your level of confidence, increase your chances of a successful relationship with a woman, and expand your network. When your money is right, you’ll have more room to have fun and enjoy life, which you’ll likely want to do now that you can afford it. You’ll go out more, meet new people and experience new things, and that’s what life is all about. Before you can distribute the money, you first have to learn how to handle the money.

Figure out your strong points, your passion, and your desire, then work in a field that will help you grow spiritually as well as financially. Pay your tithes, pay yourself, and then take care of your other expenses. Have a set amount of money that you keep in savings each month and avoid the temptation to spend it. Invest in others not only in money but also with your time and you will open up doors that yield great financial and spiritual returns. Have a budget set aside for emergencies, charitable giving and personal leisure. With all the money and blessings that come your way, don’t forget to give back and create opportunities for generations to come.

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Introduce Her To Your Family & Friends

I love spending time with my family because it’s a great opportunity to just relax and be myself. This time together is sacred, and not everyone is welcome to join the circle. I value their opinions, I respect their homes and their privacy, and the feelings are mutual. When the holidays come around, and it’s time to reunite, everyone brings their significant other and their kids, and if they’re single they bring themselves. If a woman was invited to a family function, that meant she was somebody important, and she knows it.

I had a buddy back in college (Lane) who was dating a woman who had a young child, she modeled as a hobby and I believe she was a student as well. I didn’t have to meet her to know that she wasn’t the one, I simply deduced based on the information given. I was going to school in Texas so when the holidays came around, I would go back home to New York, but would inquire as to what his plans were. He would go on to tell me about all the delicious food his family was planning on making and the relatives he would connect with, but made no mention of his lady. This was no surprise to me because I already knew that she wasn’t someone he was taking seriously for a multitude of reasons.

I would soon meet her and sure enough she was a beauty on the outside, but I didn’t see the value on the inside. It was now clearer to me why he kept her around his circle, but didn’t invite her in it. She was good enough for him to invite to bed, but not good enough to invite back home. Months and years had passed and the holidays came back around, and I would ask him again what are your plans. And he would say the same thing about visiting family, a smorgasbord of food, and the whole nine, but no lady.

We would talk, laugh and joke, and then we somehow started talking about his mom and then his girlfriend. So I asked him, “Have you ever introduced her to your mom” and he replied “Hell no!” I’m 22 at the time so forgive me, but we both laughed hysterically because we knew what that meant for her. To be in a relationship with someone for 2+ years, and have not met the most important people in a man’s life (particularly his mother/sister), that says a lot about the relationship. Obviously, that also said a lot about Lane.

He was wasting this poor woman’s time, and leading her to believe that she was someone of significance knowing full well that she wasn’t. Poor girl, I’m sure she wanted to feel significant, she wanted to meet his family, but simply didn’t know how to require it. 8 years later, neither one of them are together and have pursued new people. Hopefully she learned a valuable lesson about the value of her time. Lane got the best of her, but at the same time, he showed the worst of him and that’s nothing to be proud of.

There’s no value in stringing women along and wasting their time because your time is being wasted too. Not only are you blocking her from meeting someone that values her, but you are also blocking yourself meeting someone that you value. On the one hand, she’s foolish for falling into the trap, but on the other hand, you’re at fault for setting it. Women look to men for leadership, and that’s nothing you should look to take advantage of. This could be your daughter, your sister, or your mother who’s being led astray.

When it comes to dating and relationships, you have to think long-term. Right from the moment you meet her you should give her a thorough evaluation. Ask yourself some questions like: Could I wake up to her every morning for the rest of my life? Would I want to introduce her to my mother? Is this someone I would want to have children with? Keep these questions in the back of your mind as we lead up to them in a moment.

Before you get anywhere with a woman, you’ve got to check her out and see what she’s about. Is she confident, does she have high-esteem, is she ambitious, is she courageous, is she educated, is she goal and career oriented? The standards and requirements for dating differ from person to person, but you should look for the things you like up-front. This will help you determine whether or not you should move forward. If she passed the test, then it’s time to get started with the pursuit.

Walk up to her and introduce yourself, and get a feel of her energy. Did she receive you well, is she open to conversation, does she seem genuinely interested, is she reluctant to give information? Hopefully you were able to walk out of there with her contact information and can get to know her a little better. Remember, this is your life we’re talking about, your legacy, and you’re doing your due diligence to find a suitable partner. Hopefully this partner is going to be introduced not only to your family, but also to the world.

Too often do we skip over the process called “Getting To Know Each Other” which results in getting yourselves emotionally involved prematurely. Instead, take your time, do it right so that won’t have any future regrets. If you’re investing your time in it, and you are devoted to it, you should be proud to announce it from the mountaintops. If you feel the need to hide it or you are ashamed of it, perhaps you shouldn’t be involved in it. Sure, it’s easy to connect with someone when it’s convenient, but at what cost?

I grew up with 5 brothers and 1 sister, and many male cousins, and even as a child I knew that when a man brings a woman home, she’s significant. It would bring shame to my mom if my brothers brought home random women to our family gatherings. “What kind of men did I raise” would be the thoughts crossing her mind. For me, bringing a woman home was a proud moment; it was a sign that I was committed and trying out this whole relationship thing. The first time I brought a woman home to my mom, I was a freshman in college.

I was 18 years old and this was my first real relationship. We were both student athletes, but she was a senior, had a great job, her own car, but more importantly she was into me. I thought I was the MAN! Here I am, the new kid on the block and I managed to snatch up a senior in college who was quite in demand herself. I snatched her up quick and by the summer, I introduced her to my mother.

At that age, I didn’t know what I was doing as it pertains to relationships; I just got out of an 18 year relationship with my parents. The point is I wanted to show my girlfriend at the time how I felt about her. I felt she was important enough to meet the people who were important to me. My mother liked her, but then again my mother likes everybody. My brothers liked her and she was liked at our school too.

Were we going to get married and live happily ever after? Probably not, I was too uncertain about my own future at that age, let alone a future with a woman. I was simply putting into practice the treatment I felt the woman in my life deserved. She also introduced me to her family, and I felt it was an appropriate gesture. My family is an important staple in my life, so when the right women comes along and proves herself worthy, it only makes sense for them to meet.

She wants to meet the best friend you can’t stop talking about, or joking with over the phone. She wants to meet your child that you can’t stop bragging about. She wants to be invited over for Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner with the family and treated like she’s a part of the family. She wants to be able to interact and communicate with your family members without you being around. She wants to feel as though you are planning to make her an official part of your family.

Your time is the most valuable thing you have in this world, but know that your time is limited. Not only is your time limited on this earth, but a woman will only you so much of her time before she realizes you are wasting it. She wants to feel as if she is a part of something special, and that will require you to show her more than just you. She wants to be included in things that are near and dear to your heart. And more importantly, she wants to be given a title.

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Take Care Of Home

There’s nothing more important in this world than family. Your family comes before your job, before your friends and before your personal interests. These are the people who stand by you through thick and thin, who support you when you’re up and when you’re down and who love you unconditionally. They’re significant in your life and they make a difference in your life, which is all the more reason why you should put them first. People will come and go throughout the years, but your family will always be there. Take pride in being a family man because peace of mind starts right at home.

When your house is in order, you’ll be in a much better mood to tackle the rest of your day, and it will show in your attitude. You’ll smile more, speak more and shine a light on everyone around you. It will give you great pleasure that not only is there peace in the home, but you were a contributing factor.

Every Woman Loves A Man Who Can Cook

There’s nothing like coming home to a nice home-cooked meal prepared by someone you love. You can tell the dish was made with love because they took their time to make sure that the flavors were just right, cooked to perfection and then served. Every cook who takes pride in their work can’t wait to hear that “Mmmm” sound after they take their first bite because that lets them know that their mission was accomplished. Food is without a doubt the way to a man’s heart, but guess what? Women love to eat too! You’ll find that amongst many other things, a woman loves a man who knows how to cook.

If you don’t know how to cook, learn how. It’s important for any man to know how to work his way around the kitchen not just for the sake of his lady, but for his own sake. Not only will learning how to cook fill your belly, but it will also build your character. Everything you learn can be taught, and cooking is one of those things that never goes out of style.You can make an evening of it, invite friends over for a pot luck, have one friend chop this, another boil that, while the others peel something else. Invite over a nutritionist or a professional chef to give you some pointers on how to make cooking healthy, easy and fun.

If you have children, there will be nights and days where you will have to prepare a meal for them, and it helps to be prepared ahead of time. You’ll be surprised how easy it is to prepare and cook meals even with limited supplies once you have the skills. Most kids want fast food (i.e. Cheeseburgers, pizza, chicken nuggets, etc). You can use this information to not only prepare a meal that you know they’ll love, but you can also include them. You see now, you’ve created the perfect bonding opportunity for you and your family. You can show them how to properly season, the right temperature to cook at, and use a timer to make sure nothing gets overcooked.

Kids love to be included in family activities that are fun, and cooking is certainly one of them. I remember as a kid, my mom would bake cakes, and my brothers and I would always volunteer to help. There were so many things we could do like crack the eggs, pour in the milk/water/oil/batter, and mix everything together. There were 4 boys in the house so we had to share the responsibilities, which was another thing we learned. We got a chance to set the oven and put the cake inside and when it was finished, we would all help put icing on the cake. Our favorite part was when we got to lick the bowl. 🙂

My mother knew how much we loved those special moments so she would include us as often as possible. After awhile, my mother no longer needed to micromanage us in the kitchen; we had baked caked so many times, we could do it with our eyes closed. We would talk, laugh, sing and dance in the kitchen as we prepared a delicious cake that we would later enjoy. My mom could’ve very well made the cake on her own and would’ve gotten finished with it 5 times faster without us, but it wasn’t about the cake. My mother was creating an environment where we could enjoy one another company.

It’s a good thing she knew how to cook because my step-father’s idea of a home-cooked meal was “Franks and Beans”. Anytime my mother went out of town, we would all look at each other like “What are we going to eat” lol. We had a skillet that plugged into the wall, and when my step-dad cooked chicken inside of it, it would make this delicious crispy chicken and skin that we loved. That was the extent of his cooking and we would soon resort to “Oodles Of Noodles”. We were young boys at the time, so we would make it work for the few days my mom would go away. When my mom finally returned, we would run to her and beg her never to leave again as if she were Jesus!

We missed my mom’s home cooked meals dearly and we were ever so happy to have her back. My step-dad missed the opportunity to bond with us over that weekend probably because his dad missed it with him. This is a cycle that can be broken and should be broken. Rolling up your sleeves and getting down in the kitchen isn’t a job just for women, it’s a job for anyone who wants to have a decent meal. While you’re single, you should be developing these skills on your own, which will add tremendous value to your relationship when you have one. In fact, you may even find love while shopping for groceries; there are plenty of single and eligible candidates right in your local market.

Eating out can get quite expense, not to mention you’ll have no creative control over what actually goes into your food. You’ll save a ton of money by going grocery shopping, preparing your own meals and eating in. You’ll also learn a lot about yourself during this process, like the kind of foods you like, foods you’d love to try, and dishes you enjoy preparing the most. You can create your own menu, perfect your signature dishes and who knows, one day you may even write a cook book or become a chef. There are so many wonderful possibilities that can stem from you learning how to cook.

Eating is something that no one can live without, so by learning how to supply this demand, you can make yourself indispensable in that area. Any woman who knows me knows that if she cooks for me, she’s my NEW best friend. At my church, they have a ministry for the men called “The Front Liners”, and at our bi-monthly meetings we talk about God, life and relationships. I know what you’re thinking, “What’s in it for me?” In addition to the food for the soul that we receive at these meetings, they also provide food for the body, and that has managed to pack the house every time. It’s not rocket science, it’s simply common knowledge that people are more likely to show up at places where there will be food.

Have you ever hosted a Thanksgiving dinner for your friends and family at your home? You would if you knew how to cook! It’s fun to entertain other people with your gifts, however it’s impossible to give out something that you are without. Don’t be ashamed to go online, ask a friend, or turn to a family member for cooking lessons. I’m sure if you provided the food and ingredients that they would love the idea of coming over to teach you how to prepare your favorite dishes. Give it a try, plan a day in advance and invite over a few of your closest family members, friends and relatives. You will come out of the deal will all sorts of delicious dishes and plenty of leftovers, but most of all, you’ll have a great bonding opportunity with your loved ones.

The internet is filled with great recipes on any and everything you could possibly imagine. Subscribe to your favorite YouTube channels and stay updated on their latest creations.There are plenty of other men just like you who feel they don’t have the time, the energy or the skills to cook a decent meal. Once you make a conscious effort to make your cooking ideas become a reality, you can take pride of showing the world otherwise. Post pictures and recipes on your social networks, inspire people who are or were just like you, and show that anyone can cook.

My grandfather Hayward C. Bostock was a great chef; he studied culinary arts and it showed. As kids, we loved going to his house so that we could spend quality time with our grandparents, but what we looked forward to the most was their cooking. There was never a time where they didn’t have a fancy meal laid out for us; lamb chops, stuffing, collard greens, mac n cheese, you name it! We would pray over the food, sit, eat and talk about whatever was on our minds. After our hearts were content and our bellies were full, we wold reminisce on all the previous delicious meals that came from that kitchen.

At first, we would assume that it was my grandmother who cooked all of the meals because traditionally the women would do the cooking. It was to our amazement that in fact it was my grandfather who did a lot of the cooking. That was a proud moment for us, it gave us a glimpse of the type of man my grandfather was. It showed us that he wasn’t too proud to prepare a meal for his lady, even in his old age. They had been married for about 50 years, and although they had gotten old, he kept things fresh and new in the kitchen.

When it comes to your relationship, preparing a meal for your lady will open up many doors. First, it will open up the doors to her heart; making the time to cater to your woman is a heart-felt gesture. It will open up the doors of conversation, for there will be many flavors, colors and textures to talk about. Not to mention the relaxed environment you’ll create to talk about even more important matters. Now that you’ve shown how much you care without being prompted to do so, she’ll feel inspired to do the same.

Adding this great quality to your life will make a remarkable difference within yourself, amongst your family/friends and with your lady. Women find men who cook to be very attractive, and you don’t want to miss out on the opportunity to fall in that category. If the both of you don’t know how to cook, don’t fret because that is yet another opportunity to bond if she is willing to learn. If you both already know how to cook, even better; take turns preparing meals for one another, and also join forces and create great meals together. Team work makes the dream work!

Ordering out is easy, taking the time to plan and figure out what to eat, how to make it, and then putting it into action can be easy too. You simply have to practice and get in the habit of doing it, and after awhile it will feel natural. Like everything else in life, you won’t know how to do something until you do it. Sometimes you won’t have access to hands on training, or and adviser to walk you through, so have faith in your abilities and you’ll be just fine. You’ll make many mistakes on this journey, but you’ll also make many corrections. And the best part about learning how to cook is the tasting. Enjoy!

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A Woman Will Submit To You When You Submit To God

Women are so amazing; they’re beautiful, smart, and resourceful and add tremendous value to the world in so many ways. In today’s times, more and more women are challenging themselves to do the impossible and are proving to be quite successful at it. They are opening up businesses, running multi-million dollar companies, raising children and looking good while doing it. No longer are women of substance confining themselves to a man’s kitchen or bedroom, they are out conquering the world. Somewhere out there she believes that there is a man who is strong enough, wise enough and loving enough to settle her down, but until then she will remain “Single By Design”.

Being single is the thing you do when you are establishing/finding yourself and/or when you haven’t met someone who meets your standards. You may not like it, but being single by design sounds like a genius plan to me. There’s no sense in a woman who is loves God, is thriving in her career, being of service in her community and being a great friend to many to settle for just you if you’re not offering anything greater. In order to get a woman to settle for you, that’s exactly what you need, evidence that you have access to something greater. The way to achieve that is by showing her that you are led by truth, and influenced by love.

Often times a man believes that a woman is obligated to follow his lead simply because he is a man, and I’m here to tell you that no woman of substance is going to let that fly. You have to prove to her that you have good leadership otherwise you’ll find yourself walking alone. Life is too short to waste valuable time accompanying someone on a journey that has no destination. Women of substance know very well how simple we men are; all we need is food, sex and peace of mind and we’re good. Once we get what we want, we aren’t remotely interested in catering to their needs.

Since this is so and has been proven countless times over, a woman must protect her investment and require you to do more in order to have her hand. Your words aren’t enough; she wants to see you put things into action. You’ve been there before, a woman will make you believe that there is hope for romance, will watch you spend your time and money, and then leave you hanging. In hindsight you’re thinking “I should’ve required XYZ before spending so much time, energy, effort and money”. And you’re absolutely right, your time and resources has value too, and it’s up to you to place value on it.

There are some women out there who will sell themselves short just so that they can say they have a man, but that’s not the woman you want. She’ll make you feel better about your shortcomings, and compensate for them in any way that she can, not because she loves you, but because she’s lonely. You’ll waste valuable time in this relationship because it’s not based on truth; the both of you are in denial. She’ll submit just enough to keep you around, but not enough to keep you moving forward. Her strength comes from your weakness, and it won’t benefit her to empower you to reach your goals.

Once you reach your goals, you will no longer need her, because there was never anything truly special about her to begin with. She was convenient for the time being, she made you feel comfortable about your situation, and over time you grew complacent. Over time, she’s learned everything about you and will use that information as her excuse not to submit. For example, “You don’t pay any bills” or “You don’t do any handy work around the house” or “You can’t afford to take me out”. Now, the relationship feels like a prison because neither one of you are looking for anything better, yet you’re miserable with each other.

In a woman’s heart, she knows whether or not you are a man who will love her and do right by her, sometimes she denies those feelings and continues on with the relationship. She’s hoping that one day you will be a better man and miraculously start caring more about the relationship. She’ll try her best to dumb down her brilliance just to make you feel more like a man, but after a while that gets exhausting. Not to mention, you know as a man that you should be doing better and that what she’s doing for you is pathetic. You’ll be just itching to get yourself in a better position so that you can throw it back in her face.

Well that certainly is no way to get a woman to submit to you because a woman’s willingness to submit will be motivated by your attitude. Your attitude towards people, money, time and things will have great influence over a woman’s decision to associate with you. You could be the richest and most successful man in the world, and it would mean nothing to a woman if your attitude were poor. But show a woman that you love life, you love her and you love God and she’ll follow you to the end of the earth. Love conquers all, which is why it should always be the foundation of your relationship.

When we take into account what it means for a woman to submit to a man, know that it does not mean that you are the boss of her. Submission means to yield! We all can recall when we were students in school, we would come into our classrooms and we would focus our attention on the teacher. In a classroom, there has to be order in order to get the most value out of the experience. The teacher is there to teach us based on her knowledge and experience, and we are there to learn from him/her.

Since they have taken the time to master their field of study, we trust that they are capable of leading us into prosperity. We don’t assume the role of the teacher because we hope to learn all he/she knows. We also want the teacher to be open to questions, comments and suggestions while still taking the lead. The teacher isn’t the boss of us, she’s merely there to help us learn and grow. Throughout the school year, his/her goal is to help us become better than we were when we started.

If we as students don’t submit to our teachers, we miss the opportunity to learn and grow. But also, the teacher must remember that in order to keep our attention and earn our respect is through their attitude. They must treat us with love, dignity and respect; otherwise we will lose respect for them. And we all know what happens in a classroom when the student doesn’t respect the teacher, and refuses to submit; they cause a disturbance. Not only does the disturbance affect the teacher’s ability to teach, but it also affect the student’s ability to learn.

In the end, both parties walk away empty handed. Their attitude towards one another has ruined the opportunity for growth. When it comes to growing in a relationship, it has to be a two-way street. You can’t ask someone to yield to you if you are unwilling to yield to anyone else. When I was growing up, it seemed as if grown ups did not like to be challenged, the only possible rebuttal they could come up with was “Stay in a child’s place” or “Respect your elders” or simply “Shut your mouth”. They wanted to have the authority over you, but refused to reveal their source that gave them the authority to “lay down the law”.

Now, I’m all for respecting elders, obeying parents, etc, but right is right and wrong is wrong and I can’t just go following behind stupidity. There needs to be some sense behind your leadership in order for me to invest my time. As you grow into a man, you will find that many of the things your elders said was just plain baseless, and you have to find your own source of knowledge just as they did. Some people pride themselves in saying “My momma always told me…” well sometimes momma didn’t have the slightest clue as to what she was talking about. This isn’t to discount the wisdom bestowed upon us from our parents, but rather to encourage you to find your own way.

Times change, but principles do not. A woman should know her role in a relationship, and as a man you should too. If you don’t know how to speak to a woman, you will disqualify your own self as a possible candidate. If you don’t know how to cater to a woman, a woman won’t want to cater to you. Everyone wants to be happy, so don’t be so quick to judge a woman simply because her standards require you to do some real work.

A woman knows when a man has true substance as opposed to a man who merely offers suspense, and will submit only to a man who has proven himself worthy. You can show a woman that you are worthy simply by the way you live your life. She wants to be able to trust your leadership and she’ll feel secure in knowing that you are led by God. When you submit to and are led by God, which gives a woman a standard to hold you to. She can now put her trust in God and follow the God that she sees in you.

If God is not in your relationship, then you shouldn’t be either. God is love, and as the leader, it is your job to introduce love into the equation and set the tone. If you want your woman to go to your church, it’s your job to lead her there. If you want a woman to cook, provide the tools that she needs to prepare it. If you want a woman to let you do the taking and negotiating, prove that there is power in your words. If you want a woman to stop going out all the time, give her a reason to stay home, or invite her to do things as a couple. If you want a woman to submit, you don’t have to use force, simply show her the God given power you have inside of you and give her something to submit to.

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A Woman Wants A Man With A Plan

Right before the start of the New Year, I write out my goals for the upcoming year. This helps me to stay focused on my day-to-day, week-to-week and month-to-month activities throughout the year. Having a plan for what you want to do with your life is a great way and the only way to become successful. There’s something about a man on a mission that every woman loves and finds extremely attractive. It shows his discipline, passion and purpose in life and that’s exactly the type of man she wants to lead her.

For men, we are taught to be protectors and providers, and for women they are taught to be nurturers. In order to properly balance a relationship, both parties has to know their role and play their role. It’s unfortunate, but in many cases, fathers completely abandon or neglect their responsibility to teach their sons how to be men. This results in men growing up as males, and not having the slightest clue as to what it means to be a man. It’s up to you to break this cycle, set goals and take action!

I have the privilege of talking to many female clients on a daily basis who express their desire to be in a relationship with a man. They feel as though they are submissive and would like to be lead by a man, but under no circumstances are they willing to submit to just any man. They want to submit to a man who is led by God, has submitted to God and is prepared to lead her into prosperity. To be quite honest, I don’t follow anyone who doesn’t have a solid plan and I’m a man. My time is too valuable to waste on ambiguity and that’s exactly how women feel.

Women have to sacrifice a lot to be in a relationship with a man, so you have to be prepared to accommodate her. “What do you mean women have to give up a lot”. Well when she marries you, she has to give up her maiden name and take on yours, she carries your baby for nine months and hopes to get her figure back, she takes care of the household and nurtures the people in it, and that’s just for starters. A woman who is willing to do all of those things wants to be assured that she won’t have to do so uncomfortably. Could you imagine having to struggle and carry a baby for nine months, bring him/her into a world with no security, and be disciplined by a man with no discipline?

You have to show a woman that not only do you have a plan for your own life, but you also have a plan for the life you are trying to build together. So often we men get distracted from our goals simply because we see a beautiful woman with a nice body. Sure, it’s fun in the beginning, but before long, she will look at you and say “What’s next”. Oh you’ve been there before fellas, everything is going well; you’re getting food, sex and peace of mind and then she hits you with “What are we?” “Where are we going with this?” “Are we in a relationship?”

Women want to be led, they want a plan, and they want to look forward to something fresh, exciting and new. When you first meet her, she wants you to initiate the conversation, ask for her number and then set up a date. She wants you to call her, take the time to get to know her, and then plan an actual date. After the first date, she will want another, then another, then another, and after she’s comfortable being around you, she will want even more from you. At this point, she doesn’t just want to date, she’s attracted to you, the days, weeks and months are going by and she’s not getting any younger.

After all this time spent together, she adores you and is fascinated about what you’re going to do next. She sees the value in you and is wondering if you see the value in her. She wants for you to ask her to be exclusive so that the two of you can grow together and build a legacy. She will have faith in you if you show her that you have plans on being in her life tomorrow. When you don’t take steps towards growth, you give a woman doubt about where the two of you stand in the relationship.

The vast majority of young women aspire to one day be in a loving marriage, have children, a nice house and all the wonderful things that come with it. She’s looking for her knight in shining armor and she’s hoping that that person is you. Yes, I know, marriage is the furthest thing from your mind right now because you’re too focused on your next paycheck, and that’s fine. By all means, get your personal and professional life together, but if you’re investing time in a woman, know that she’s expecting you to lead. If you can’t afford to date, then don’t!

Yes, there are many women who date for free meals, but we’re going to focus this part of the discussion on the woman of substance. Women of substance are tired of dating endlessly and aimlessly, tired of sleeping around and are looking for something solid/serious. All she wants is a man, who will love her, protect her, provide for her and do so on a consistent basis and be loyal. If none of those things are in your plans, then you are not ready to be in a relationship with a woman. The idea is to have a plan to constantly upgrade your relationship or marriage so that it doesn’t get stale.

For example, if you’re interested in a woman and she’s your co-worker, associate from church or classmate, upgrade the relationship to a friendship. A friendship will allow you to build a closer and more genuine relationship with a woman without any added pressure. You will open up a side of her that is warm, loving and sincere, and you will show her that same side of you. During this time, you will begin to explore what one another values and can then figure out how you can add value to her life. If taking the time to build with a woman isn’t a part of your plan, you are not ready to be in a relationship with a woman.

If you are willing to take your time and get to know her, you’ll have the perfect opportunity to upgrade the friendship to dating. This is where the two of you get to not only talk about the things you like, but you get to experience them. Women love to be entertained and you can never go wrong with taking a woman out on a date. Most women are so deprived of a good date that she’s likely to drop everything she’s doing just to be out of the house with you. All she needs to know is the time, date, location and it’s a date!

Why would a woman drop everything that she’s doing just to go out on a date with a man? Because she wants companionship, she wants to be seen in the latest fashion, glammed up and on the arm of a great man. Sure, she can take herself out, sure she can go out with her girls, but that gets old and she wants something new. This is what makes you so valuable to a woman, you have the opportunity to show her a good time and become a go-to source for fun and excitement.

The more you plan to show a woman a good time, the more she will want to be around you. Consequently, if you neglect the planning process, she will eventually get bored with you and outsource for fun and excitement. The whole point of being in a relationship is to enjoy being together, so it’s important to give her a reason to be in a relationship with you. It doesn’t get any simpler than figuring out a time, date, location and activity and extending the invitation to your lady. Plainly put, she doesn’t want to be the only one who has fresh ideas and the desire to enjoy life as a couple.

You will find that when you meet a woman’s folks, one of the first questions they will ask is your plan for the future. Why do they care? They care because they’re not getting any younger, they want the best for their daughter and they want to see their grandchildren grow up. You may be charming and good-looking, but none of that matters when it comes down to their daughter and her future. They want to know that you are reading, willing and able to protect and provide.  And rightfully so; you wouldn’t give your daughter away to some guy who didn’t have a plan would you?

The key to a long-lasting relationship is planning for it to last. You have to think about tomorrow, next month, next year and years to come, not just right now! You have to be honest with yourself about where you are in life and what your plan is for your future. Having a plan for your own life should be a pre-requisite for planning a future with a woman. A woman will believe in you for as long as you show signs of moving forward, and once those signs dwindle, she’s be moving out.

Enjoy the dating experience, the friendship and the previous association and then upgrade to a committed relationship. Upgrade your new relationship by introducing your partner to the people who are important in your life. Propose the idea of marriage and confess your love to her before God and witnesses. Fall deeper in love, have children and build your legacy. Once you’ve got the girl, treat her as if you’re trying your best to keep her. Don’t let the relationship get old, keep it fresh and new.

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-AskCheyB

Teaching My Son About Money Management

Fatherhood is nothing short of amazing and is extremely rewarding. Every moment with my son Ethan is an opportunity for the two of us to bond. Even when he’s sleeping, I pray over him and take this grand opportunity to give him the kisses that he denies his father when he’s awake. lol He wants the world and he certainly deserves it. He excels in school, helps with cooking and cleaning, he’s respectful to his parents and everyone else. GOD I love this kid! lol

He doesn’t ask for much… a gumball here, a toy there, pizza, etc., but after exposing him to things like Times Square and all it has to offer (i.e. Toys R Us, House Of Wax, Movies, Pictures with every cartoon character you can think of, etc) his desires grow and so do the expenses. He’s 6 years old but very independent and is very much a go-getter. He receives an allowance every Friday (granted his behavior during the week permits it), and for awhile he would let his money sit inside of a piggy bank collecting dust while spending all of Daddy’s money.

Well I figured, it’s time we start figuring out what to do with this money once and for all. We emptied out the piggy bank and counted every penny. His smile lit up as I exchanged all of the coins for a $20 bill, $10 bill, $5 bill, and some $1 bills. He managed to save up $37 from his allowance and immediately wanted to get to spending it. I thought this would be a good time to teach him the basic principles of accounting. We created a balance sheet and he learned what debit, credit, and balance meant.

His mom then brought to my attention that he had purchased $46 worth of movies on grandmas cable without permission. Ahhh his FIRST real bill! “This is going to be a great life lesson for him” I thought to myself. We put $37 in the credit side of our account, and $46 in the debit side of our account, leaving the balance $9 in the negative. Right before his eyes he saw his “life savings” disappear. He was in tears and was heart broken over the loss.

I explained to him that it’s only money and that you will earn more and when you do, you need to manage it better. You will be held accountable for your actions. When you make purchases on or offline, you have to have the money to cover the expenses and you shouldn’t make purchases online without first asking permission.

Ok so after a few minutes of him crying, I stepped in the way a father should and I got my son out of debt. I donated $10 to his account to put him back in the positive. He now has $1 in his piggy bank. After seeing a full piggy bank, that $1 coin sitting there in his piggy bank all by itself will serve as a reminder of the consequences that come with being financially irresponsible.

At first, Ethan’s heart was broken b/c he saw his money come & go, but he learned a valuable lesson about money management that will last forever! Today, he lost a front tooth and is expecting a visit from the tooth fairy. Needless to say, his luck has quickly turned around, and there’s a smile right back on his face! 🙂

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6 Common Mistakes Single Women Make

1) They Don’t Want To/Know How To Cook– Food is the way to a man’s heart. Although every man has the means to prepare his own meal, order out, or hire a chef, there’s something special about having a home-cooked meal prepared by his special lady at home. After all, if a man has to prepare his own meal, pay to order out, or hire a chef, he can do so at half the cost it would take for him to accommodate a significant other. If your goal is to one day be married, you should already possess the qualities of a wife, and that includes taking care of the home. No matter where the food is coming from, a man will find his way to it, so don’t miss this opportunity to keep your man coming home to you.

2) They Look For A Man– Men are hunters, go-getters, and leaders by nature. Getting dressed, being confident, going out, and pitching a woman for a chance to get better acquainted is something that quality men of substance look forward to. When a woman goes out and looks for a man, its as if she is assuming the same exact position that a man is preparing himself for. One of the joys of being a woman is that you don’t have to look for a man. When you’re worthy, the right man will find you.

3) They Work Too Much– In these challenging times, we all have to work to make ends meet, but with everything in life, there has to be balance. If you only make time for work, or if your work overextends into the time that should be allocated to family, friends, and loved ones, then that gives off the impression that you don’t value the relationship that you have with them. Two things that men value are “time and money”; if you don’t have the time, he won’t invest his. Making time for love is also a great way to avoid becoming a man’s sexual convenience, and will open up the possibility of a meaningful relationship. The more value you put in, the more value you’ll get out.

4) They Confuse Sex With Love– Sex brings out extreme emotions in a woman. For men, it’s just a few minutes of satisfaction. In order for a relationship to have longevity in a positive way, it has to first be built on a solid foundation. A man will value and respect you more if/when you respect yourself. Men are simple and only require Food, Sex, And Peace Of Mind. In exchange, you should require love, dignity, and respect. Remember, if you’re giving him everything that he wants, you’ll never be all that he needs. Men value women who can provide them with what they need and make them earn what they want. #Standards

5) They “Friend Zone” Good Men– Let’s be honest. There are good men everywhere! In many cases, women simply are not interested. Good guys finish last because some women don’t see the value in being with him first. The “bad boy” offers mystery, adventure, excitement, but is often ambiguous when it comes to monogamy, future plans, and stability. Good men aren’t hard to find; they’re collecting dust in your Rolodex. Friendship is the key to romance, so if you’re looking to find love, look first at your true friends.

6) They Travel In “Packs”– For a man, it takes a great deal of inner strength to muster up the confidence to speak to a woman and risk being rejected simply because she’s “not in the mood”. This truth multiplies when a woman travels in “packs” of other women. It gives off a “Waiting To Exhale” kind of vibe that screams “WE ARE TIRED OF MEN AND DO NOT WANT TO BE BOTHERED”. Sure there are men who will challenge themselves to walk right up to the entire group and introduce themselves, but you’ll have a far better chance of a attracting a man if you travel alone or perhaps with one girlfriend at a time.

If you’ve been inspired by today’s blog, please subscribe, post your comments below, and share it with your friends. Also, please add me on Facebook & Follow me on Twitter!

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Life & Relationship Coach

-AskCheyB