The Power Of Monogamy

Let me start off simply by saying that there a billions of women in the world, and you only need one. No matter where you go, you will always find extraordinary women who will blow your mind and the fact is, you simply cannot have them all. There will be tall women, short women, big women, small women, and women whose curves are so unbelievable you can’t even describe. While it may be fun to chase as many women as your heart desires at the beginning stages of your life, it will prove to add very little value to your life as you get older and start walking in your purpose. Don’t feel bad, it’s perfectly normal for a man to explore and see what’s out there in the world, this is why they call getting married “settling down”.

Not to mention, the more successful you become as a man, the more women will want to associate with you. And not just any women, but the one’s you’ve always dreamed of. You know, coke bottle shape, gorgeous face, great in bed, don’t talk much and on top of that is a “magician” and knows when to disappear. The one’s that don’t ask questions, will go along with anything, and don’t require much. The reason why these women should remain in your dreams is because they won’t add value to your life in reality. They will take you further and further away from being the quality man of substance you are destined to be and from walking in your purpose.

Once you grow up and mature, you will look back to those same women who didn’t have any requirements, no standards, and were down for whatever and say “I need more”. When you reach a higher level of maturity, your values will shift and you will begin to go after what you need as opposed to what you want. This state of mind will humble you and give you a greater appreciation not only for yourself, but for other women. Learning to value and respect women is the key that will unlock the door to more positive relationships with other women, which will eventually lead to your happiness in a healthy relationship. This process doesn’t happen overnight, it will take you some time to experience the bad before you appreciate the good.

After ripping and running from your mid teens into your late 20s and lord forbid your 30s+, the world around you will start to look at your life and want to see progress/results. How does your personal decisions in relationships effect others people’s association with you? I’m glad you asked. 🙂 Your relationship choices shows your level of discipline, commitment, loyalty and devotion or the lack thereof. We all reserve the right to be selective when it comes to our relationships, however the choices we make will heavily influence how closely people on the outside looking in will choose to associate. People want to know that you are committed to something, whether it be getting back into shape, saving money, charitable giving, community service, raising a child, marriage or whatever.

The beauty in committing to someone or something in your life is the value the comes from it. When you commit to something, not only are you showing the recipient that you value the relationship, but you will inevitably be on the receiving end that comes with that union. Loyalty may be a small word, but it’s a BIG thing. Maturity and growth is a part of growing up and it’s essential to your success in life. You might have a favorite shirt that you liked that over time you simply grew out of, and when you grew out of it you were forced to go out and look for something better. Had you held onto that shirt, not only will it begin to depreciate, but the people around you will also see that your fear and/or reluctance to upgrade.

When it comes to relationships, women who are seriously looking to commit want to make sure that they are teaming up with the best. She wants the security of knowing that you are capable of taking care of yourself and have the heart to take care of her. The first thing she’ll notice is the way you dress and carry yourself. This information should give you a heads up on how to prepare yourself for a relationship with other people. It’s time to let go of the old, and upgrade to the new. That means a new attitude, new perspective, new heart, mind and spirit.

For so long, we’ve been cheating ourselves and spreading ourselves thin thinking that the best thing that could ever happen to us is getting fast and easy benefits from a woman. Getting benefits from a woman that you did not earn only yields short term success. It’s only a matter of time before either you get bored, or she requires more. Hopping from one woman to the next not only wastes your energy and money, but it always waste valuable time that you can never get back, and it effects your credibility as a quality man of substance.

The same way us men don’t want a woman who’s been around the block and back is the same way women feel. There’s no pride in knowing that the women you work with, went to school with, or for heaven’s sake went to church with have all had a turn with you. It’s just as shameful for a woman who’s dating a manwhore as it is for you dating a woman with a promiscuous past. A man should take pride in saving himself for marriage just as a woman should, and protect him name, reputation, and credibility at all costs. After all, this is the name that you eventually plan to share with a woman, and no woman wants to take on a name that’s tainted.

But never mind the marriage for a second, as a man it’s important that you have respect amongst your peers. If you don’t have respect amongst your peers, then they certainly won’t have respect for your marriage. Marriage is a full-time job, so before stepping into it, take on the job of being single, building up a positive name for yourself, getting your life in order, and preparing for the obstacles that will come when inviting a woman into your life. A marriage is a partnership, however you first have to become a suitable partner. Being in a marriage will be so much more enjoyable when you know your value and are able to consistently contribute your share to the union.

One of the most popular reasons for divorce is sheer boredom, followed swiftly by finances. While single, you have the opportunity to work on both having your finances in order and developing a tolerance for other people’s thoughts and feelings. Committing to something for life is not something that you’re being forced to do, so if you choose to go through with marriage, have a plan! If you don’t plan for your marriage to succeed, then your marriage will eventually fail. If you plan accordingly, marriage will add tremendous value to your life and will continue to add value until death.

Many people bail out on marriage because it’s not what they thought it would be. When many people think of marriage, they foolishly believe that there won’t be any struggles, and that is far from true. In a marriage, you will experience new problems, problems that didn’t apply to a sex-driven relationship where both parties were simply looking to have a good time. No, you see now there are real issues, real responsibilities, and real crisis that demand your attention. You will say to yourself “This is all new to me” on many occasions, just know that your wife will be saying the same thing. This is all new to you both because you have upgraded your relationship and are transitioning into new things.

What a married couple has that a regular boyfriend/girlfriend relationship doesn’t is the promise that no matter what, they will stick together through the good, the bad and the ugly. That’s the power of monogamy, you’ve got somebody who’s got you. You ever look on an application where it asks you your “relationship status”? It never asks about the girlfriend because the word “girlfriend” in and of itself is enough evidence to show that the relationship has not yet grown to it’s full maturity, so it is too soon to even acknowledge. A marriage on the other hand indicates that you have declared before the courts, God and witnesses that you have chosen to be with this person and vice versa for life.

There’s a sense of pride in being able to declare your love, loyalty and commitment to someone before the courts, God and witnesses. You’ve just done something with your life that will forever be a part of your legacy. You’ve made a name for yourself, worked hard to become a quality man of substance, and then finally you’ve shared this honor with someone else. That’s more than you can say for your past relationships, but this time, you’re committed forever. Part of the reason your past relationships didn’t last was because you never planned for it.

Most of your past relationships were based on everything except the most important thing of all, love! If love isn’t the foundation in your relationship, everything that you build on top of it will eventually crumble because it wasn’t solid enough to hold it together. Yes, marriage is forever but there’s nothing to fear if you’ve chosen the best partner to enjoy the rest of your life with. You don’t lose your independence when you exchange the rings, you gain something new called “Interdependence”. That means that you no longer have to do everything all by yourself, you can depend on each other.

Let me break it down a little further for the brothers who are still on the fence about this “Declaration Of Interdependence”. When you get married, hopefully you will have reached a level of maturity where you are 100% done with flirting, dating and sleeping with multiple women. More importantly, it is my great hope that you have finally found a woman who is not perfect, but is perfect for you. She accepts you for who you are, and is dedicated to helping you become even better than the way she found you. When you think of your wife, not only are you excited about your future, but you have no intentions on ever returning to the women from your past.

What you’ve just done for yourself and for your lady is you’ve upgraded the relationship, and that is a sure sign of growth. First you started out as friends, then dating, then a couple, then engaged, and then marriage. The relationship is constantly growing, reaching new heights and the sky is the limit. If you’re starting to get bored, all that means is you’re not actively working towards continually upgrading the relationship. There is so much you can do to add value to your marriage like have children, adopt children, exercise, travel the world, start a new business, just to name a few.

That’s the beauty of a marriage, you get to upgrade different facets of your life with someone who actually signed up for it. Together you will figure out how to keep a roof over your head, clothes on your back, food on your table and romance in the bedroom. It will give you peace of mind having this security in your relationship which will allow you to be a better man, a better husband, a better father and a better leader. Lacking discipline when it comes to relationships is something that holds many men back from being successful in life. So much time, energy, effort and money is wasted trying to conquer women that he never masters the art of being with a woman.

Women of substance don’t look to marry just anything, they have standards, and after building yourself up to be a quality man of substance you’re going to be more than ready to meet her. There’s no need to feel pressured into getting marriage, I’m simply sharing the value that comes with it. Marriage isn’t for everybody, marriage is only for the ready. If you’re going to make a life-long commitment, build yourself up first so that you’ll have the knowledge, the skills and the tools you need to maintain it. Happy wife, happy life!

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Take Care Of Home

There’s nothing more important in this world than family. Your family comes before your job, before your friends and before your personal interests. These are the people who stand by you through thick and thin, who support you when you’re up and when you’re down and who love you unconditionally. They’re significant in your life and they make a difference in your life, which is all the more reason why you should put them first. People will come and go throughout the years, but your family will always be there. Take pride in being a family man because peace of mind starts right at home.

When your house is in order, you’ll be in a much better mood to tackle the rest of your day, and it will show in your attitude. You’ll smile more, speak more and shine a light on everyone around you. It will give you great pleasure that not only is there peace in the home, but you were a contributing factor.

6 Valentine’s Day Do’s & Don’ts!

Most Life & Relationship Experts would be for all the Valentine’s Day hoopla! Mending broken hearts, suggesting which restaurants to take your significant other out to dinner, or how many roses and chocolates to buy, etc. To me, Valentine’s Day is just another day and we shouldn’t get caught up in the pressure to buy our partner’s love. I believe if you truly love someone, everyday should feel like Valentine’s Day and one day out of the year shouldn’t be a reflection of the love you have for your partner. Below you’ll find 6 tips Valentine’s Day Do’s and Don’ts that may help you have a more meaningful Valentine’s Day this Holiday season.

1) BE COMFORTABLE IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP

If you need a dozen roses, a diamond ring or a box of chocolates to prove the love found in the relationship, chances are the love isn’t really there. It’s the little things that count (i.e. Time spent, hugs, kisses, love and affection). Don’t let the Holiday’s and the pressure from media, friends and family force you to do something just for the sake of doing it. Show your love in your own special way.

2) BE COMFORTABLE IF YOU’RE SINGLE

You don’t need a man to enjoy Valentine’s Day. Date yourself! Don’t think that you have to have someone in your life in order for you to love your life. #SingleByDesign

3) SAVE YOUR MONEY

On Holiday’s like Valentine’s Day, restaurants are packed, cards, roses and chocolate sales are at an all time high, and most men are spending ridiculous amounts all in efforts to please a woman.     Instead of spending hours traveling to and fro a destination, sitting in a crowded restaurant where you can’t actually enjoy the intimate time with one another, think of creative ways to enjoy  each other’s company in a romantic way right at home. Don’t let Valentine’s Day pressure you into breaking the bank.

4) SHOW YOUR PARTNER THAT YOU CARE

Most people feel pressure to go out and buy something on Valentine’s Day. I was in a store shopping for a few clothing items and there was a gentlemen next to me getting ready to buy a cheap pair of $7.99 “gold” earrings for the “women he loved”. He looked at me and said “It’s the thought that counts”. Sometimes, communicating those thoughts with a simple “I love you and I appreciate you” will suffice. Showing someone that you care can’t be bought; love is something that you invest. Don’t waste your money on things that have no value/meaning.

5) GET TO KNOW YOUR PARTNER

The better you know your partner, the easier it will be to please them no matter what time of year it is. Personally, I could sit back, watch movies at home, eat a home cooked meal, and end the evening with a “happy ending” for the rest of my life and never have to leave home. A box of chocolates, card and a teddy bear would be the wrong gift for “me”. You’ll save money and time by having a better understanding of what makes your partner happy. Don’t buy a gift just for the sake of saying you got him/her something, give from the heart.

6) SET AN EXAMPLE FOR THE CHILDREN

Kids look forward to Holidays because it gives them an opportunity to be creative and to celebrate! Our job as parents is to show them the true value and meaning of the celebration. The power of giving and being selfless will stay with them for all the days of their lives. By giving gifts from the heart (i.e. Handmade cards, pictures, and video messages) it helps build their character. It’s important that they understand early on that money can’t buy you love. Don’t lead your child to believe that one must go out and buy something in order for the gift to have value.

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Every Woman Loves A Well Dressed Man

As you grow and mature, show should your wardrobe. When you’re a child, it’s cool to wear sneakers that light up, jeans with all types of crazy designs and hats with your favorite cartoon characters on them, but when you’re an adult, not so much. The first thing people will notice when they see you is your attire, so give them a good show. From your hair-cut, to your outfit to your shoes, be sure to present yourself as the person you want to be known and remembered as.

Growing up in a house full of boys, I didn’t know WHAT to wear. I was too busy trying to dress like my older brothers. For years, my mom would try to nip that in the bud by dressing us all alike, but as we grew older, we wanted our own unique style. If my older brothers said it was cool, then it was, and if they didn’t I would still rock it with pride, defending it to the death. I had the good fortune of getting many hand-me-downs because I was much smaller than my older brother. Once they grew out of it, I gladly stepped into it.

Finally, I got to incorporate my older brother’s style into my wardrobe which was constantly growing. Even if the clothes didn’t fit me, I would find a way to make it work. We had lots of different ways to make our clothes last because we had to. The only time we went clothes shopping was during back to school season. For the rest of the year, we knew not to ask my mom to shop for anything! We had clothes from the previous year that we would reuse until that couldn’t be used anymore.

We could cut jeans into shorts, dye jeans black, or bleach them white; whatever we had to do to make them last. We didn’t have a lot of clothes, but no matter what, we were always sharp. Especially on Sundays, my mom didn’t play when it came to our “Sunday outfit”. We were “suited and booted” each and every Sunday, all dressed in the same cut suit. People always thought that me and two of my older brothers were triplets, and I would say “No, it’s just the suits”. lol

There was a lot of pressure growing up in the NY area to dress a certain way. For us, the latest fashion was Air Force One’s, Timberland boots, NY fitted caps and the big puffy goose coats. There was nothing particularly special about these things, they simply were apart of our culture at the time. And since everybody else had them, we wanted them. My mom never succumbed to the pressures of buying into the propaganda, she would simply stick to her regular once a year shopping habits. Thank God she did, otherwise I would be a total wreck trying to keep up with name brands and such.

In fact, I didn’t even know what a name brand was until I was in the fourth grade. I remember because I had gotten my very first pair of Nike’s. I was attending a new school, and someone made a comment saying “Oh I see you’ve got name brands”. I smiled and was like “Yea!” but in my head, I thought “what in the world is a name brand”. Prior to this instance, name brands meant nothing to me, I was simply happy to have a new pair of sneakers on my feet that I liked. After school I asked my older brother Shane “What is a name brand” and he gave me the answer.

Apparently, having name brand clothes and shoes some sort of stamp of approval amongst the people who thought they were cool. From that point on, I made a point to request name brand shoes when we went shopping. Of course, when we went shopping the name brands cost much more than regular sneakers, which resulting in me settling for a pair of sneakers that had the Nike brand, but was as ugly as sin. I didn’t have any clothes to match it, they weren’t diverse and could work with any occasion and it didn’t add any value to my life. I had been sucked into the vicious cycle that many of has become victims to.

When you’re a kid, you’re not concerned with the cost of things, because it’s not coming out of your pocket. All you can think about is making a good impression on your friends at school. You don’t want the cool kids to pick on you because of your poor style of dress or worst, being laughed at by the girls. You want to feel good about yourself, and please others at the same time. During the early stages of your life, finding your own identity will be one of the greatest struggles you will face in your life.

As you grow older and mature, your values will begin to change, as should your style of dress. Your goals are higher and your network larger, your vision clearer and your confidence stronger. Over time you’ve learned how to value the person who goes into the clothes and not merely the clothes themselves. You’ve told yourself over and over how valuable you are, how intelligent you are and how good looking you are. And then as you begin to dress yourself, you tell yourself “I look even better with these clothes”.

Your style of dress will change dramatically depending on where you are in life. I’ve had the good fortune of living in New York, New Jersey, Atlanta, and Texas, an each state had their own unique style. New York and New Jersey had very similar taste, however Atlanta and Texas was a whole nother world. In Atlanta the boys would actually tuck their jeans into their socks; strange, but it was their thing. In Texas, the boys would use a ridiculously excessive amount of starch on their jeans; very strange, but it was their thing.

No matter where I lived, I tried my best to adjust based on a number of things: who I was, where I was and the people who were around me. I wanted to “do as the Romans did” while I was in Atlanta, but also maintain my New York swag. I tried my best to hold onto my New York accent, and would occasionally tuck my socks into my jeans. While in Texas, I literally used an entire can of starch on my jeans and still could not get it right. I was losing myself trying to fit in; it did nothing for my budget, nothing for my credibility and nothing for my peace of mind.

In my junior year of high school, I transferred to Saint Anthony high school in Jersey City, NJ where I immediately joined the popular basketball program. Thank God we had a uniform that we wore everyday because I did not want to have to explain to my teammates why I was tucking my jeans into my socks or super creasing my pants. I would’ve ruined any possibility of a friendship with the guys, and I could forget about getting a date with the girls. Even with our uniforms the guys would figure out a stylish way to finagle their individuality. It wasn’t enough to wear khakis, you weren’t cool until you got the ones with pockets in them.

After graduation, I moved back to Texas and attended Texas Wesleyan University, but I refused to crease my jeans. “I’m a New Yorker”, I thought to myself “and I will stick to my Air Force One’s, Timberland boots, baggy clothes and NY fitted caps. I was the MAN during that period of my life, but still growing. All of the girls at college loved the way I dressed, my NY swag, and my NY accent. Down south they treat New Yorkers like we’re celebrities!

One of the problems that I faced was when I went back to NY, there was nothing special or unique about the way I dressed, my accent or my NY swag. Everyone and their mother had it! It was so bad, that you could hardly recognize a lot of the people because they all looked the same. The same Air Force One’s, Timberland boots, White T-Shirt, blue NY fitted cap and bubble coat (if it was winter). I was a statistic and it was all my fault; I didn’t know how to dress. Even my long braids was a fashion fad that was getting old.

I tried to apply to a job in NY and they said “No braids”. I loved my braids, but I was not going to let a hairstyle get in the way of my future. I remember the day, it was June 5, 2005 when I cut them and it felt good letting go. I felt like a grown man, and not only did I let go of the braids, I let go of the baggy clothes, Air Force One’s, Timberland Boots, and bubble coats. My new closet consisted of shoes, slacks, blazers, suits, ties, button down shirts, sweaters, vests and overcoats that fit. I’ve managed to completely re-invent myself by doing away with childish things and started walking, talking and dressing like a man. I wanted to look the way I felt, so I did away with everything that made me look like a boy running around the streets of Brooklyn and started to dress like a man who runs New York.

Sometimes in order to change your life you have to change your ways; this will require a complete destruction of your old self and a reconstruction of your new self. Now, when you walk into a room people will want to know who you are, what you do and even wear you shop. Women will be attracted because you dress and carry yourself like a man of purpose, an effective leader, and a role model. You will spark interest in others which will result in exclusive invitations into their social circles simply because you appear as if you belong. Finally, you will feel better about yourself as a man because now you’ve done more than simply made an adjustment to your wardrobe, you’ve made an adjustment to your attitude, and an even greater adjustment to your life.

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Every Woman Loves A Man Who Can Cook

There’s nothing like coming home to a nice home-cooked meal prepared by someone you love. You can tell the dish was made with love because they took their time to make sure that the flavors were just right, cooked to perfection and then served. Every cook who takes pride in their work can’t wait to hear that “Mmmm” sound after they take their first bite because that lets them know that their mission was accomplished. Food is without a doubt the way to a man’s heart, but guess what? Women love to eat too! You’ll find that amongst many other things, a woman loves a man who knows how to cook.

If you don’t know how to cook, learn how. It’s important for any man to know how to work his way around the kitchen not just for the sake of his lady, but for his own sake. Not only will learning how to cook fill your belly, but it will also build your character. Everything you learn can be taught, and cooking is one of those things that never goes out of style.You can make an evening of it, invite friends over for a pot luck, have one friend chop this, another boil that, while the others peel something else. Invite over a nutritionist or a professional chef to give you some pointers on how to make cooking healthy, easy and fun.

If you have children, there will be nights and days where you will have to prepare a meal for them, and it helps to be prepared ahead of time. You’ll be surprised how easy it is to prepare and cook meals even with limited supplies once you have the skills. Most kids want fast food (i.e. Cheeseburgers, pizza, chicken nuggets, etc). You can use this information to not only prepare a meal that you know they’ll love, but you can also include them. You see now, you’ve created the perfect bonding opportunity for you and your family. You can show them how to properly season, the right temperature to cook at, and use a timer to make sure nothing gets overcooked.

Kids love to be included in family activities that are fun, and cooking is certainly one of them. I remember as a kid, my mom would bake cakes, and my brothers and I would always volunteer to help. There were so many things we could do like crack the eggs, pour in the milk/water/oil/batter, and mix everything together. There were 4 boys in the house so we had to share the responsibilities, which was another thing we learned. We got a chance to set the oven and put the cake inside and when it was finished, we would all help put icing on the cake. Our favorite part was when we got to lick the bowl. 🙂

My mother knew how much we loved those special moments so she would include us as often as possible. After awhile, my mother no longer needed to micromanage us in the kitchen; we had baked caked so many times, we could do it with our eyes closed. We would talk, laugh, sing and dance in the kitchen as we prepared a delicious cake that we would later enjoy. My mom could’ve very well made the cake on her own and would’ve gotten finished with it 5 times faster without us, but it wasn’t about the cake. My mother was creating an environment where we could enjoy one another company.

It’s a good thing she knew how to cook because my step-father’s idea of a home-cooked meal was “Franks and Beans”. Anytime my mother went out of town, we would all look at each other like “What are we going to eat” lol. We had a skillet that plugged into the wall, and when my step-dad cooked chicken inside of it, it would make this delicious crispy chicken and skin that we loved. That was the extent of his cooking and we would soon resort to “Oodles Of Noodles”. We were young boys at the time, so we would make it work for the few days my mom would go away. When my mom finally returned, we would run to her and beg her never to leave again as if she were Jesus!

We missed my mom’s home cooked meals dearly and we were ever so happy to have her back. My step-dad missed the opportunity to bond with us over that weekend probably because his dad missed it with him. This is a cycle that can be broken and should be broken. Rolling up your sleeves and getting down in the kitchen isn’t a job just for women, it’s a job for anyone who wants to have a decent meal. While you’re single, you should be developing these skills on your own, which will add tremendous value to your relationship when you have one. In fact, you may even find love while shopping for groceries; there are plenty of single and eligible candidates right in your local market.

Eating out can get quite expense, not to mention you’ll have no creative control over what actually goes into your food. You’ll save a ton of money by going grocery shopping, preparing your own meals and eating in. You’ll also learn a lot about yourself during this process, like the kind of foods you like, foods you’d love to try, and dishes you enjoy preparing the most. You can create your own menu, perfect your signature dishes and who knows, one day you may even write a cook book or become a chef. There are so many wonderful possibilities that can stem from you learning how to cook.

Eating is something that no one can live without, so by learning how to supply this demand, you can make yourself indispensable in that area. Any woman who knows me knows that if she cooks for me, she’s my NEW best friend. At my church, they have a ministry for the men called “The Front Liners”, and at our bi-monthly meetings we talk about God, life and relationships. I know what you’re thinking, “What’s in it for me?” In addition to the food for the soul that we receive at these meetings, they also provide food for the body, and that has managed to pack the house every time. It’s not rocket science, it’s simply common knowledge that people are more likely to show up at places where there will be food.

Have you ever hosted a Thanksgiving dinner for your friends and family at your home? You would if you knew how to cook! It’s fun to entertain other people with your gifts, however it’s impossible to give out something that you are without. Don’t be ashamed to go online, ask a friend, or turn to a family member for cooking lessons. I’m sure if you provided the food and ingredients that they would love the idea of coming over to teach you how to prepare your favorite dishes. Give it a try, plan a day in advance and invite over a few of your closest family members, friends and relatives. You will come out of the deal will all sorts of delicious dishes and plenty of leftovers, but most of all, you’ll have a great bonding opportunity with your loved ones.

The internet is filled with great recipes on any and everything you could possibly imagine. Subscribe to your favorite YouTube channels and stay updated on their latest creations.There are plenty of other men just like you who feel they don’t have the time, the energy or the skills to cook a decent meal. Once you make a conscious effort to make your cooking ideas become a reality, you can take pride of showing the world otherwise. Post pictures and recipes on your social networks, inspire people who are or were just like you, and show that anyone can cook.

My grandfather Hayward C. Bostock was a great chef; he studied culinary arts and it showed. As kids, we loved going to his house so that we could spend quality time with our grandparents, but what we looked forward to the most was their cooking. There was never a time where they didn’t have a fancy meal laid out for us; lamb chops, stuffing, collard greens, mac n cheese, you name it! We would pray over the food, sit, eat and talk about whatever was on our minds. After our hearts were content and our bellies were full, we wold reminisce on all the previous delicious meals that came from that kitchen.

At first, we would assume that it was my grandmother who cooked all of the meals because traditionally the women would do the cooking. It was to our amazement that in fact it was my grandfather who did a lot of the cooking. That was a proud moment for us, it gave us a glimpse of the type of man my grandfather was. It showed us that he wasn’t too proud to prepare a meal for his lady, even in his old age. They had been married for about 50 years, and although they had gotten old, he kept things fresh and new in the kitchen.

When it comes to your relationship, preparing a meal for your lady will open up many doors. First, it will open up the doors to her heart; making the time to cater to your woman is a heart-felt gesture. It will open up the doors of conversation, for there will be many flavors, colors and textures to talk about. Not to mention the relaxed environment you’ll create to talk about even more important matters. Now that you’ve shown how much you care without being prompted to do so, she’ll feel inspired to do the same.

Adding this great quality to your life will make a remarkable difference within yourself, amongst your family/friends and with your lady. Women find men who cook to be very attractive, and you don’t want to miss out on the opportunity to fall in that category. If the both of you don’t know how to cook, don’t fret because that is yet another opportunity to bond if she is willing to learn. If you both already know how to cook, even better; take turns preparing meals for one another, and also join forces and create great meals together. Team work makes the dream work!

Ordering out is easy, taking the time to plan and figure out what to eat, how to make it, and then putting it into action can be easy too. You simply have to practice and get in the habit of doing it, and after awhile it will feel natural. Like everything else in life, you won’t know how to do something until you do it. Sometimes you won’t have access to hands on training, or and adviser to walk you through, so have faith in your abilities and you’ll be just fine. You’ll make many mistakes on this journey, but you’ll also make many corrections. And the best part about learning how to cook is the tasting. Enjoy!

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-AskCheyB