Online Dating

In this day and age, there are more and more people taking advantage of technology and applying it to their lives. We are no longer in the era of the telegram where our sources of communication were extremely limited. Social networking sites such as Facebook, Twitter, and various sites specifically designed for dating have made it easier for people to make a connection for whatever purposes one chooses (keeping in touch with friends, business, dating). There’s no such thing as “online dating”. “Online” is simply the place where the introduction is made between two people.

Anywhere there are women, men will follow, and men will pursue them with the hopes of some day connecting on a romantic level. This is true for social networking sites, the grocery store, school, church, the library, you name it! Men are always on the lookout for women they could potentially get closer to romantically, and especially online. If you’re interested in dating, relationships, or marriage, it’s a great idea to keep an open mind to the possibility of meeting new people any and everywhere people can be found. Since the majority of people spend their time online, there’s a high probability that men will approach you online. The possibilities of meeting someone new and making a love connection right from your computer are endless.

The beauty of meeting someone online is you have the opportunity to research any of your admirers before taking action. Take Facebook for example, you can look through their pictures and get a feel of their personality and character, you can also see their relationship status, what friends you have in common, location, education, career, and other pertinent information all before saying hello. You’ll notice that people on social networking sites always reveal things about themselves; not realizing how much it reflects their character. You could probably learn more about a person’s character in 1 minute by viewing their online profile than in 1 hour of talking to them in person.

Before a man introduces himself to a woman, he studies her momentarily, then figures out exactly what he’s going to say to try and convince her that he’s someone worth knowing. A woman won’t admit it, but she prefers being seduced over hearing the absolute honest truth. A man would love to walk right up to a woman and say “Hey, let’s have sex right now!”, but that doesn’t work well with women. He instead has to be gentle, use a subtle approach, and somehow convince her that he’s after more than just her body. Since you’ve never met this man and you haven’t had the opportunity to fully assess him, your mood+the words that come out of his mouth,+his approach will be the determining factor in his success with you.

Never listen to a man’s words… always follow his actions. When you follow a man’s actions, you will see for yourself what he values, how he carries himself, and how he treats other people. When you listen to a man’s words, he’ll tell you any and everything you want to hear. Thanks to the power of the internet, you can follow a man’s actions without him even saying a word to you. J Since getting to know a man’s character has been made so readily available via his online profile, use this information to your advantage. If you’re a beautiful woman, you’re going to constantly get propositioned for dates on and offline, so instead of closing off the possibility of meeting men online, just do your “research” and be selective.

When you meet someone on the internet, there’s no obligation to actually pursue one another, it’s simply an exchange of words amongst two online friends. You’ll come to find through your conversations and interactions that there are many interesting people right there in your social network that could potentially add value to your life on some kind of level. If they were good enough to be added to your network, they should at least be good enough to entertain in conversation. You don’t have to date any and every person who shows interest in you, but there’s no harm in entertaining the men who do show interest in you. With any and everything you do in life, you want to go where you’re celebrated, not tolerated, so feel free to give those men on your friend list a chance if they prove to be worth it!

If you’re uncomfortable exchanging contact info, you can take advantage of private messaging or instant messaging and get better acquainted right in the comfort of your own home. You don’t lose anything from building relationships with new people; however you could potentially gain a new lover, friend, or even a business partner. You might have a business idea that you’re trying to get off the ground and you need more supporters; what better people to market to than the men right there in your network who show interest in you? This could possibly give them the opportunity to take a genuine interest in your life and you in theirs. #WinWin

No matter where you meet a person, “dating” is something that has to take place in person. When you meet them online, you’re simply granted the opportunity to pre-evaluate them before taking the extra step of meeting them in person. A first date should always be in a public setting simply for safety and comfort anyway, so don’t let fear be an obstacle that you place before you and an admirer. Let go of your fear, and enjoy the people who take an interest in your life no matter where you meet them.

Keep in mind that a man who’s viewing your online profile also has access to your profile pictures, status updates, etc and will very well make a judgment on your character before he approaches you. Men are very visual, so always present yourself in the way you want to be perceived. If for example you’re half naked in your profile picture, you’re going to attract men who are interested in your body as opposed to your heart and mind. They probably won’t even bother reading your profile because they’ve already made the determination that the bedroom is the only place they’re willing to go with you.

Your image reflects who you are as an individual, so don’t think that because it’s “Just Facebook” that you’ll be given a pass for acting out of character. If you carry yourself with dignity and respect at all times, the men you attract will do the same. There are plenty of available options that men could choose from online, so make sure you’re attracting these admirers for the right reasons and not the wrong ones.

Relationships are about two individuals coming together to become one! If you’re going to date, pursue a relationship, or pursue a marriage, it’s going to require you to be vulnerable and trust your partner. Sure you could get your heart broken, sure you could get abandoned, sure you could be disappointed, but part of the beauty of being in love is enjoying what’s presently happening and not knowing what the future holds. If you meet someone and there’s chemistry, don’t hesitate to act on those feelings and take a chance on love.

Not everything in life will be logical or practical; some things are done simply out of love because love has no reason! Life is short, and you don’t have to live your life in fear, or have regrets about things that you should’ve, could’ve, or would’ve done. Don’t let work and school be the only things you go hard in life for; people are worth it! There’s a world of educated, career driven, quality men of substance online, and you can even search them by key words. Use this to your advantage and explore the possibilities of love! Create a profile on a social network showing the world who you are, post a stellar profile picture and bio, and get ready for the quality men of substance to pour in. Happy Dating!

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Q: There’s someone on Facebook that I like; we’ve never met. How do I go about asking her out?

Q: There’s this girl I friended on Facebook. I don’t know her in real life but we are now “FB friends” and just interact via messages and status updates and we do communicate well too. I’m trying to think of how to ask her out without being all wierd about it what would you recommend doing to go about doing that?

A: Women like men who are confident in themselves and in their abilities. The first step you need to take is believing that you are someone worth knowing, having as a friend, dating, and more. When you believe in yourself, others will believe in you. With this in mind, never be afraid to go after something you want, no matter the situation. No one walking this earth is a God, we are all human beings! If you want a loan for money, if you want a promotion at your job, if you want to take a woman out on a date, ask and you shall receive. If your proposal is denied, it’s not the end of the world, you live to be accepted or rejected another day!

If/when you’re rejected, use this experience to help you better formulate a plan to get accepted the next time around. The worst that can happen is you will be told “No, thank you. I’m not interested!”, but there’s also a possibility of being told yes, but that’s only if you put in the request. Women enjoy being pursued by men, but she will not give everyone the privilege of going on a date. What motivates a woman to go on a date with a man is a) her physical attraction to him b) her spiritual connection with him c) her desire to simply be wined and dined by a man who can afford to do so (A.K.A. The convenience) all of which are heavily influenced by her current emotional state.

Friendship is the key to romance, so if see a woman you feel would make a great wife, using the friendship approach is a great way to show her that you value her time, energy, conversation, and presence. Friendship also allows you to get closer to a woman’s heart, her interests, her background, and will open up a doorway to information that will inevitably make her vulnerable to you. With this valuable insight, you can use what you’ve learned to fill any voids you’ve discovered are missing in her life.

Your friendship, just as your money & resources are valuable and should be protected. Not everyone will be deserving of your time, energy, money & resources, so choose wisely. Life & Relationships is like a game of chess; study your target, plan your next move(s), and always keep your mate in check! When you are pursuing someone, you have to study them and feed off of their energy; everything they say and do should influence the next thing(s) you say and do. You should prepare in your mind exactly what you might say or do in the event that your target moves left, right, up, or down, leaving them nowhere to go but right in front of you!

In studying your target, you may come to find that that person isn’t interested in entertaining you at all, and when this happens, you put that person in the “convenience” box. In other words, give a person the same amount of energy they are giving you. If a person is giving you 0%, you give them 0%, the same goes for 100%, 70% 40% 10%, etc! Go where you’re celebrated! You want to give a person you’re all, and you want the same in return! Conversation, dating, and relationships shouldn’t be a struggle between two people, this should be an enjoyable time that’s mutually beneficial for both parties.

When two people are genuinely interested in having a romantic relationship with one another, the signs are evident! This is called “Chemistry”; there’s nothing forced, it’s completely natural. When two positives come together, there’s a positive reaction which leads to more positive interaction. When you speak to a person of interest, their reaction will be that of mutual interest (if there is chemistry). If there is no chemistry, put forth time, energy, and effort into someone you have made a connection with. Commit yourself to those who constantly give you hope; omit yourself from people who constantly give you doubt!

Life is about building relationships and leaving behind legacies! Continue to live your life, go after the things you want and be fearless in doing so. By setting goals, having ambition, and being determined, you will develop strong interpersonal skills that will help you see past a person’s intimidating persona, and continue to knock, open, and even break down doors to get the things you want in life! You only live once! A man should always be the aggressor and pursue a woman and be confident in doing so. Shy and timid are two traits that a woman does not look for in a man who wants to at some point protect and provide for her. Believe in yourself, be the aggressor, and close the deal!

“If at first you don’t succeed, dust yourself off and try again!” -Aaliyah

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