Two things that we men value most in life are our time and our money. Our time gives us the opportunity to build relationships, find happiness and make a difference in this world. Our money helps us to further reach those goals. In order to be successful at building relationships, finding happiness and making a difference in the world, we must learn to properly manage one of the things that help us to do so. Our money has the power that we give it, but before we give it, we must place some sort of value on it.
When I was a kid, I placed high value on pennies, but apparently not everyone did. I would find pennies in the couch, outside on the ground on the floors of stores, you name it. Since nobody else wanted them, I would pick them up, put them in my piggy bank and over time would wrap them up in 50-cent wrappers and spend them. I remember asking my family members to save their pennies just for me. They happily obliged and every time I saw them, I had a few dollars that I could spend (in pennies). These brown, dirty coins meant the world to me because it afforded me everything that I wanted at the time.
My appreciation for pennies as a child has helped me tremendously as an adult because I learned how to appreciate money right down to the cent. I also realized that if I wanted to have more than just pennies, I wouldn’t find them lying around on the ground, in my couch or on the floor of a grocery store, but I had to earn it. My mother had 5 boys and 1 girl, so if you can imagine, money had to stretch over all of us, and if we wanted anything extra, we had to earn it. My siblings and I caught on to this early on and began our entrepreneurial endeavors. We knew that no matter how much money we earned while we were out hustling, we had to make it stretch over time.
I would always wonder where my older brothers were getting their extra money from, because I knew for sure that my mom wouldn’t dare overlook me (the obedient one) lol and give only to my brothers. They finally let me in on their secret and told me they were bagging groceries at Shop Rite at Route 440 in Jersey City. I was excited because this was something that I could do; all I had to do was get my older brothers to take me with them. They soon obliged and I immediately went to work bagging groceries, pushing their carts to their car and getting tipped for my good service.
I had more money in my pocket than ever (tax free), not that I knew what taxes were at 9 years old. Now what to do with all this money, hmmmm? I bought popcorn, pretzels, a hero, oodles of noodles, a case of soda, fruit snacks, and kept the rest for a rainy day. I was in HEAVEN! The best part was we all had our own money, so we didn’t have to try our usual scheme to mooch off of one another’s dough. This was my first taste of financial independence; money that I earned on my own that didn’t come from mom.
As the money came and went, I quickly learned what it meant to earn a living and be financially responsible. I enjoyed when the money came, and was sad when the money went. I had to figure out how to get the money to stay in my account otherwise I’ll never truly be financially free. I know, these aren’t the typical worries of a 9 year old, but my entrepreneurial spirit kicked in early! I wanted what I wanted when I wanted it and I didn’t want to have to depend on my mother to give it to me.
For a lot of young men, there are no lessons on what to do with a dollar once he gets it. This often results in a boy who grows into a man not understanding the value of money. When there’s no value in principle placed on a dollar, he’ll treat it as if it’s just a dollar. But no, it’s more than just $1, it’s a tool that can help you build anything you want in life, all you need is a blueprint. When you think about an infrastructure, there’s a blueprint for what you foresee coming to life in the future. There’s also an advisory board consisting of stakeholders, contractors, and investors who are involved in the process of the development.
Before the shovel even hits the dirt, there is a plan on what to do with every dollar invested; also known as a budget. This budget is designed to invest in anything that will add value to your progress and help avoid any overspending. This way when you decide to go into your bank account to make withdrawals, you have a certain amount allocated to whatever it is you’re doing while leaving some left over. Without a budget, you’ll be prone to empty out the entire account and spend with no end in sight. This is fast and easy way to stay broke, by not budgeting your money.
Figure out what your expenses are on a daily, weekly, monthly and yearly basis and try to keep them at a minimum. If you can avoid adding on new expenses, by all means do so. Your fixed expenses such as your rent, car note, cell phone bill, transportation, food, etc should be accounted for in advance. If your expenses outweigh your income, you’ll either have to cut down your expenses or figure out a way to generate more income. Maybe a cheaper rates plan on your cell phone, or cut down on driving and take public transportation. The idea is to balance out your account to where you have more coming in than going out.
This will help you gain the financial freedom that you desire which will give you more time to spend with your friends, family and loved ones. With all of these things, you will gain peace of mind. Managing your money isn’t something that’s impossible; it’s simply something that you have to work towards. You have to learn to respect the money that you earn, and use it to invest in things that will yield a return. The more you invest in things that yield a return, the more returns you’ll have coming in. If you spend every dollar that you have, you’ll have to work longer and harder to keep money coming in.
If you’re working a full-time and you’re always broke, it’s not the income that’s the problem it’s the outcome. The money is there, but the person who possesses it isn’t making the best use of it. Anytime you get a dollar in your hand you should think to yourself, “How can I turn this $1 into more?”. If you have that kind of attitude towards money, you’ll find yourself on the receiving end of more it. Work smarter, not harder.
When I was 6 years old, I was hit by a car and the judge awarded me a large settlement that I would receive once I turned 21. When I was 6 I would say I would use the money to buy my mom a house, and would disregard any sibling who was ever mean to me. Lol As I grew older, as my feelings towards my mother changed (typical kid) and as my expenses grew my mind slowly changed. I was a sophomore in college and boy could I use the money. I took a lump sum as opposed to receiving payments every 5 years.
I thought to myself “Tomorrow’s not promised, and if I’m smart about my investment, I’ll have made far more money than this settlement could offer by the time I’m able to receive it”. I invested in a new laptop, made a payment on my school tuition, put some in the bank, and invested $10,000 into my new photography equipment. To date, I’ve made that money many times over with my photography business and am very much satisfied with the decision I’ve made to pursue my passion. I could’ve went on a crazy shopping spree with all that money, but that would not yield me any future return. The goal for me was to invest in something that could forever generate income.
When you make your first investment, and it goes well, share it with your close family members and friends. This is a great way to build relationships with them and to show them where you are in life. When people see that you are buying your first home, starting your own business, or giving to charity, you’ll motivate them to do the same. People want to be surrounded by positive and successful people, so make sure that you make the cut. The way to get invited into one of these circles is to simply focus on your life, your business and your finances and work towards success.
All it takes is discipline, a set of goals and a plan of action and you are on your way to becoming the financially responsible adult you are destined to be. This will help boost your esteem, improve your level of confidence, increase your chances of a successful relationship with a woman, and expand your network. When your money is right, you’ll have more room to have fun and enjoy life, which you’ll likely want to do now that you can afford it. You’ll go out more, meet new people and experience new things, and that’s what life is all about. Before you can distribute the money, you first have to learn how to handle the money.
Figure out your strong points, your passion, and your desire, then work in a field that will help you grow spiritually as well as financially. Pay your tithes, pay yourself, and then take care of your other expenses. Have a set amount of money that you keep in savings each month and avoid the temptation to spend it. Invest in others not only in money but also with your time and you will open up doors that yield great financial and spiritual returns. Have a budget set aside for emergencies, charitable giving and personal leisure. With all the money and blessings that come your way, don’t forget to give back and create opportunities for generations to come.
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Life & Relationship Coach