Sex is a wonderful thing to share with someone, and it can be an even more enjoyable experience if both parties mutually love/respect/care for one another. Your body is a temple; you have one life to live, and no one can protect your body better than you can so be sure to be as safe as possible when engaging in sexual activity with someone. Being abstinent is the best way to protect yourself against STDs and pregnancy, however, if you’re going to be sexually active with someone, it’s a good idea to protect yourself by requiring that the man wear a condom.
Many women won’t like this next part, but the ladies are going to love it…
Contrary to popular belief, there are gender roles in life. Due to the “times changing”, and women gaining more and more independence, many have lost sight of these gender roles and traditions. Condoms are meant to protect sexual partners from HIV/STDS and prevent pregnancy, however, a male should at the very least be responsible enough to provide protection if he so wishes to enter a females body. At one point in time, a woman’s body used to be… a “temple” and sex took place after marriage. In this day and age, females are carrying around condoms “just in case” they happen to have sex on the way to work, at the gym, on vacation, etc.
A “lady” never carries around condoms because a lady knows exactly where she’s getting sex from, when she’s getting sex, and from whom! The condoms are stationary and never move! A woman who is less than a lady isn’t sure who/when/where she’s getting her sex from, so she carries condoms just in case the occasion were to ever arise. A lady makes a man wait until he has proven to be worthy of having her body, so in the mean time, conversation is the only thing a lady carries. By carrying condoms, a woman suggests that she is ready, willing, and able to have sex anytime, any place, and with anyone! This is what I like to call “surprise sex”!
One of the reasons why men slack off is because there will always be a woman somewhere ready, willing, and able to take on “his” responsibilities. A man does not have a vagina, and since this is so, he never purchases or carries female condoms (as much as they would protect them from STDs/pregnancy. A woman doesn’t have a penis, but she makes it her business to purchase, store, and carry something that simply isn’t made for her (not including substitute forms of pleasure). Any man a woman would consider allowing into her body should be capable of purchasing/providing his own protection. If not, he should not be considered as a sexual partner because he’s not showing that he cares enough about his health to protect it! If he doesn’t make it his business to be prepared to protect his own body, one can only imagine the distance he’ll go to protect hers (or the lack thereof).
There is a deeper correlation to consider when looking at a female carrying around condoms. This practice does not apply to every female; only a “certain type” of female carries around condoms. Men love sex, anytime, anyplace, anywhere, and with anyone! A lady simply doesn’t have sex anytime, anyplace, anywhere, and with anyone. Her body is “exclusive” to one man and with this one man, he treats her like a lady, gives her time to prepare, arranges a suitable/comfortable environment, and romances her before sharing their bodies with one another. There’s communication and planning on both parts, and the man will not risk not being ready for the world!
The woman who carries around condoms is known as “Ms. Ready, Willing & Able” or a “Jump Off” because a female carrying around condoms gives off the impression that she is ready, willing, and able to jump on/off of any guy at any given time. No patience, no restraint, no value!!! Sex should be given to a man once he’s earned that privilege. Once that privilege is earned, he knows better than to show up unprepared. A responsible adult male doesn’t need a woman’s assistance when it comes to carrying condoms… believe me!!! Sex is on his brain all day and all night; He will be prepared!
Since men love to have sex anytime, anyplace, anywhere, and with anyone, he will certainly appreciate the fact that you have a spare condom, but he will not respect you as a lady, but as a whore! He will enjoy the hour of pleasure, and even thank you afterwards, but he will forever view you as “that girl who carries around condoms”. In the front of his mind, he will suspect that this is who you are, and how you handle yourself in your everyday life with other men. It’s equivalent to a man carrying around a morning after pill… “Hey, you just never know when you’re gonna need these!”
***The only time a man might not be prepared with a condom is when it’s fast/easy/sleezy/surprise sex with whomever is available. When it comes to a lady, “surprise sex” occurs with the man she’s committed to. Surprise sex without a commitment strips a woman of her “lady like” image/title and places her in the category of the “jump off”. Jump offs need condoms because they never know when things are going to “jump on/off”.
Jump off– A female who’s ready, willing, able to have sex anytime, anywhere, with anyone just for thrills.
A prostitute carries condoms everywhere she goes because sex is what she does for a living, and she has to protect herself from HIV/AIDS/STDs & pregnancy from the random men she sleeps with. It’s literally “her” job to make sure she is protected because the men approaching her care nothing about her health, and clearly they care nothing about their own if they’re willing to sleep with a prostitute. With this in mind, it makes perfect sense for a prostitute to carry around condoms on a regular basis.
A woman carrying condoms is a huge reflection of her character. It’s far deeper than “I want to be safe”. It’s symbolic of impatience, ambiguity, and promiscuity. Michelle Obama, Oprah Winfrey, 1st Lady Serita Jakes, and hopefully your mother are less likely to carry condoms because they are ladies of strong character, good morals, values, and principles. They respect their bodies, their families, and their reputation enough to have sex “exclusively” with the man they married. Buffie Da Body, Lil Kim, and Remy Ma… on the other hand are more likely to carry around condoms because they exhibit poor character, and lack a good set of morals, values, and principles.
A man may have concerns with getting a woman pregnant, but chances are you won’t find him carrying around cases of the morning after pill. If he did, that would certainly be a huge reflection of huge character and suggest that this isn’t the first, nor will it be his last experience in having unprotected sex with a woman he doesn’t want to have a child with. A man cannot take morning after pills, so he has no business carrying them. It’s a female’s decision to invest in and consume the pill, so it should be left up to her to retrieve them. As with a male and his condoms.
Communication is key! By communicating with your partner that you would like to have sex on Saturday, 8pm, at 123 Hump Rd, you give the man an opportunity to prepare himself to have a safe, clean, and fun sexual experience with you. He has time to shower, prepare mentally, and also retrieve condoms to protect you both from STDs and pregnancy. With communication, you eliminate any and all ambiguity, and you also give the man the opportunity to prove that he is capable of being responsible.
If a man you’re considering for sex shows up without condoms, then that’s only “one” major issue you need to consider. In the heat of the moment, you will notice that a man will still sleep with you with or without a condom (not knowing his status or yours). Having your condoms ready “just in case” only protects you from STDs and pregnancy for that hour, however it does not solve the issue of your sexual partner not caring enough about himself to protect his one and only body from STDs! If he doesn’t care enough to protect his own body, he certainly won’t take precautions for yours. Instead of making it easy on these men and still accepting them for not coming prepared, they should be rejected for that reason!
Men and women are different in many ways. The average straight male does not do a regular check-up at the doctor’s office. If a man has HIV/AIDs/STDs, it’s highly probable that he’s had it for months or even years. When you use that condom that you’re carrying around in that “better safe than sorry” situation, the sex will bring you closer and closer to that person. Before becoming closer and closer to a person sexually, get closer and closer to their personality, character, morals, values, and principles, and most importantly… get to know their status. These key ingredients will raise your awareness/confidence in knowing/trusting your partners judgment. With trust comes shared responsibilities! When it comes to sex, one thing a man is very capable of being responsible for is carrying a condom, so allow him this one task while you (the female) take on another!
If your goal is to be “cautious”, abstinence will suffice. If you choose to have sex, take extra precautions such as talking to your partner about one another’s sexual activity with others, the level of exclusivity you expect from them, and go get tested together. Communication is key! If you are not interested in having unprotected sex, make having a condom a requirement. If he wants to continue having sex with you, and if he respects you and himself, he will make it a point to have condoms ready each and every time the two of you are ready to have sex. Continue to be a lady, and only associate yourself with a respectable gentlemen. A man will respect you when you show him that you respect yourself!
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Life & Relationship Coach