All straight men have a motive!!! Straight men use “friendship” as a way to bring them closer to a woman and to possibly build a romantic relationship. They might pretend to be your friend, but in actuality, they’re using a well thought out, planned strategy that women don’t acknowledge as a strategy, or simply choose to ignore it as strategy. His agenda is to wait for as long as it takes until you’re in your most vulnerable state so that “you” will finally be ready to do what “he” have always wanted to do from the start. While the female may look at him as a “brother from another mother” or what have you, the male does not in any way shape or form view you as a sister, or even a friend for that matter. If you don’t believe me… Throw yourself at this “brother” of yours and watch how quickly he takes you down 😉
A man might wait years or even a lifetime to declare his love or interest in a woman. This is all a part of his plan to successfully seduce a woman into believing that it was the endless conversations about love & relationships, the constant interaction, and the desire to fill a void she’s been missing is the force that’s driving him to suddenly confess his dying love. and he brings women’s guards down, by attacking indirectly. A man knows upon first sight whether he’s interested in sleeping with a woman or not… and vice versa.
A woman knows upon first sight whether or not she is interested in sleeping with a man or not. The difference between men and women is, if there is no n her heart, she knows that there is something about this man that’s making her keep in contact. The 3 reasons a woman remains in contact with a man is because she secretly loves him, lusts him, or is using him for his resources.
Wrong!!! Going in for the kill too son would ruin his plan. He has to wait for the right moment. The moment where the move he decides to make won’t make you run away from him forever! We live in a visually oriented society, so when a man approaches a beautiful woman, it’s because he wants to sleep with her, not because he wants to be her friend.
Once he approaches the woman and says what he has to say, it is up to the woman to decide what direction she wants the relationship to go in. His desire to sleep with you thought will never go away. In fact, the only chance you have at reducing his interest in sleeping with you is by actually sleeping with him. Otherwise, his desire to sleep with you will grow stronger and stronger after all the time spent, all the conversations, and all the interaction. What you’re experiencing is a false sense of security. He respects you just enough not to cross any lines and save face, but not enough to be a genuine friend.
He’s your friend in a sense that that’s the category you want him to remain in, but in actuality, he’s just another who would love to sleep with you, and will sleep with you if ever given the opportunity. It’s a false sense of security that will only grant you short-term victories. No one likes to feel used or abused, so choosing friends who can add value to your life, while you add value to their lives as well prove to be longer lasting.
It will take a man who has options and has high esteem no time at all to figure out that his role in your life is to “be there” when you need him. This is an honor that a man would give to the women in his family, his girlfriend, or his wife, and since there’s no room for potential romance between you two, the person you call on for favors should be a male relative or your significant other, because random guys will expect something in return and use their favors as “down payments”. In other words “You owe me”.
A blood brother on the other hand would be more willing to do things for you simply because you’re blood, and even with blood relationship, his willingness to do things for you will have limits. A man who is “just a friend” doesn’t have anything invested in you, so his loyalty to you will depend on how close he thinks he’s getting to you. If this friend suddenly gets into in a relationship of his own, this friend is no longer considered an option because the things he would normally do for you are being done for a woman who has actually earned those privileges or is currently earning them through a “mutually beneficial arrangement”.
If during this time you would like to call on this friend for a favor, you run the risk of causing turmoil in his relationship because a man who’s in a relationship has no business doing another woman favors due to the emotional and psychological effect(s) it has on one or both parties (i.e. Sexual tension). His loyalty should remain to his woman exclusively. There even comes a time where even “mom” gets told no (when it comes to your wife).
If you closely associate with a man who’s romantically interested in, be sure to consider the costs. If you’re mutually interested in him, by all means, spend as much time as you’d like with him. If you’re not mutually interested in him, know that if you closely associate with him, it’s only a matter of time before he makes a sexual advance through his actions or his words. It’s the law of attraction and it should never be ignored. Be aware… be smart… be safe!
Life & Relationship Coach